The Turning Point

[krispy]

I knew I needed a fundamental change for some time. I kept taking tiny steps forward but they were always followed by giant steps backwards. Now I have definitely taken a few giant steps forwards and I honestly believe this is the turning point.

Late last year I had open heart surgery and have just begun cardiac rehab. On day one I had to do a mental health questionnaire due to the frequency of people struggling in this way after such life altering surgery. My results set off alarm bells but it wasn't in any way due to the surgery. My GP was advised of the results and despite planning to again stay silent on the truth i hate admitting, I did. I told him of my addiction, my debts and the feeling of self hatred it had filled me with. As well as referring me on to a professional and recommending Gamblers Anonymous, he was adamant that I needed to tell my partner. The hardest conversation of my life was received with understanding that I couldn't believe. She worked with me on a plan to tackle the debt. I agreed to cancel my online gambling accounts and to remove the ability of my credit cards to be used for gambling. I agreed to go to GA meetings, the first of which i am nervously off to tomorrow.

I know the challenge isn't setting up a plan but sticking to it. I know I'm just a the beginning but I've taken steps i never thought I could. Its not possible to say I WILL succeed with certainty, but I am certain that I CAN do this. Already there is a feeling of achievement from those first steps and that feeling of achievement has made the last few days less difficult than they would otherwise have been.

[JB-nsw]

Thats great that you are ramping up your efforts @krispy. You have added accountability to others and taken other big steps to help. You are on the right path. I look forward to reading more from you.

[JinxyWolf]

Hi @krispy and Welcome,

First of congrats on taking the steps towards beating your addiction, it takes great courage to admit that you need help, so you have already shown that you have the strength to walk the gamble free path. Also having the courage to tell your partner about your gambling addiction takes guts so big pat on the back for that.

We all have doubts about being able to kick the gambling habit when we begin this journey, it is a tough road and you will have ups and downs. The main thing to remember is to reach out when things get tough, lean on those you love when you feel yourself wavering, don't be afraid to let them know you are struggling. This is not a journey you should do alone and luckily you don't have to. There are so many resources out there to help you as you have discovered by joining this forum and going to GA meetings.

Try not to look to far ahead, or dwell on past mistakes, it's all about learning from our mistakes and looking forward, one day at a time.

So I wish you the best on your journey and know we are here for you.

JinxyWolf

[Kevcollingwood]

@krispy well done, you have taken the first steps, hope to count the days and weeks with you, all the best.

[pamela]

Well done on sharing your problem.You have made the right decision ,it will be a hard road to travel but with your partners help ,it should be easier.
Take it one day at a time

[Calvin (facilitator)]

Well done @krispy Loving your determination ! We are all here to support you!