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  • New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    Hadenoughnow
    Junior Member
    Posts: 3
    Joined: Wed Nov 06, 2019 9:12 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Nov 07, 2019 7:43 am

    I’m 54 and have had an on again off again battle with poker machines for 20 years
    I’m over the stress and anxiety caused by losing money on these evil machines and I want to turn my life around because it’s never to late
    I’ve self excluded myself from all established gambling houses in my town and I’m determined to beat this addiction for ever
    Thanks 🙏
    2 x
    Calvin (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 359
    Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2018 5:01 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Nov 07, 2019 11:17 am

    Hi @Hadenoughnow

    Well done on reaching out ! Great to hear your determination.
    Taking it one day at a time is key. Taking small steps to lead up to your long term goals of becoming free from the gambling habit.

    What steps are you taking to help yourself stop?
    0 x
    Hadenoughnow
    Junior Member
    Posts: 3
    Joined: Wed Nov 06, 2019 9:12 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Nov 07, 2019 11:24 am

    Not sure what else to do other than self exclusion but I am open to any ideas
    1 x
    Hadenoughnow
    Junior Member
    Posts: 3
    Joined: Wed Nov 06, 2019 9:12 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Nov 07, 2019 11:36 am

    Calvin (facilitator) wrote:
    Thu Nov 07, 2019 11:17 am
    Hi @Hadenoughnow

    Well done on reaching out ! Great to hear your determination.
    Taking it one day at a time is key. Taking small steps to lead up to your long term goals of becoming free from the gambling habit.

    What steps are you taking to help yourself stop?
    Not sure what to do but I am open to anything
    I’m over being at the stage of losing my money and I’m a shaking mess because I’ve lost and sometimes I’m physically sick in the car park after losing
    I’m done with it
    2 x
    Calvin (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 359
    Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2018 5:01 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Nov 07, 2019 11:41 am

    You can look into seeing a gambling counsellor for more ongoing support. Many people find this helpful. Along with that, the counsellor can help put self-exclusion in place, where you can ban yourself from up to 35 different venues around your area.
    In the meantime, really try to identify what your urges are. Some people say that its the feeling of winning that urges them to gamble, chasing losses, daily stresses, using gambling as a relaxation tool etc. theres plenty of urges people experience.
    Once you identify these, then you will be able to become more aware of them in the moment and also learn tools on how to better respond to them.

    You can call our helpline on 1800 858 858 for immediate support and also a referral to see a counsellor.
    1 x
    kittykat
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Thu Nov 21, 2019 8:59 am

    Last resort

    Thu Nov 21, 2019 9:08 am

    I have made the first step in changing my life. I have been gambling for 16 years. I'm ashamed, depressed and angry. I'm sick of hating myself. I'm sick of the suicidal thoughts. I woke up this morning thinking either i leave my husband and start fresh because i know he'll be better off without me or i end it all for good. Instead i rang the helpline...now I feel hopeful. I don't feel so alone. Its just the start, I hope i can get help.
    2 x
    Calvin (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 359
    Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2018 5:01 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Nov 21, 2019 11:43 am

    Good on you for reaching out @KittyCat

    Welcome to the forums!
    This is a free space for people to get support with gambling. I'm glad to see that you have taken that step in sharing your journey so far.
    Things may seem pretty heavy for you right now, but the more you don't gamble the lighter things will become. Be patient with yourself.
    At this point in time, its helpful to become mindful of what your urges are to gamble.

    Also, good on you for calling the helpline, were you given a referral to a face to face gambling counselling service?
    1 x
    WashedUp
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:40 am

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Wed Dec 04, 2019 3:20 am

    Hi, :confused:

    This is my story.

    I am a 29yo male who has had gambling involvement for nearly 10 years now with a serious issue for 4 years off and on. A similar tune to others on this site, I have lost plenty..

    As an 18yo I worked at a harness race track, though recall I only ever had one bet over that 2 year period. My family never gambled growing up and I myself had no desire for it.

    Gambling for me was initiated at the casino, as a few friends at the time enjoyed heading there for a flutter (like any 18yo would). I didn’t lose large sums of money and did not head there often, but do recall maybe being there 5-6 times a year over my young adult life.

    The stem of my addiction likely started in my semi-professional sporting life in my mid 20s. With young guys, the term “have a punt” is a lighthearted warm account of spending time with “the boys” and enjoying a few drinks and a bet on the races. This lighthearted Saturday afternoon pastime would eventually unravel me.

    I completed my Commerce Degree at 23, and landed a job in the finance industry, what I thought to be a great start to my professional career. By 25, I bought my 1st share in a house and had my girlfriend move in whom was excited to share the rest of her life with me. At 26, I found my world starting to unravel. Throughout the earlier years I gambled on occasions but nothing near referring to it as severe, though the last 4 years has been anything but. I never, or very rarely gambled with anyone but myself and became somewhat of a recluse with it.

    In 4 years, I have lost a severe sense as to who I really am, as well as 2 serious relationships with 2 gorgeous women, the latest of which is the love of my life and the essence of my perfect person.. not to mention countless friendships, the trust of those I care about and to top it all off, a cool $150,000+ in cash. I have stolen from family, friends, who although I have always paid back, have the realisation of the respect I have lost along the way as a direct result my actions. It’s time to earn that back, if possible, slowly and respectfully but hopefully with the power and presence of a 19th century steam engine locomotive.

    The issue started to rear its uglyy head at around 26. Basically, I had lost maybe $10,000 of savings in 6 months and I was scared shitless of my partner & parents finding out as I was gambling all the money I needed for my housing repayments. I then accepted a loan from my employer with the plan for it to assist keeping my head above water. The fact was, it was the chain & anchor to the depths of despair. I first lost my partner and then my house.

    The loan was increased on 3 seperate occasions to an end figure of $50,000. Once that was gone, I leant money from wherever I could, namely other financiers and my dad. Before I knew it, I had over $100,000 in debts. My family found out and helped bring me back to reality though with little ability to pay the mountain of debts. This has culminated in a 2 year legal battle which has taken its toll mentally. I saved my money and gambled rarely but knowing me still on occasions at 27 & 28. I managed to resign in Feb this year from the finance job with my credit history indicating finance is likely the wrong industry. I have subsequently returned to University to complete a post grad.

    At 29 after my sport season had finished I slipped again and after saving $20,000 aswell as a dream car, lost them both within 1 week. I have 12c to my name, lost my soul mate, and if it were not for my parents would likely be sleeping in a gutter somewhere (if not 6 feet under).

    For me, the worst part of gambling is the lying. You forgot what is important and you say anything to feed your next bet, no matter what the cost. The 100 day challenge I don’t feel will be an issue for me, as I have smashed it before I relapsed, being more worried about my triggers. This seems to lead me down a spiritual journey of re-discovering my young happy bubbly self and getting an understanding into the subconscious mind, where habits, behaviours and addiction hide, though meditation. Wish me luck and thanks for listening.
    0 x
    isarah
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Tue Dec 03, 2019 8:59 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Wed Dec 04, 2019 10:50 am

    Hi everyone

    I joined this site last night after another very frequent loss. I really decided that it was time for a change I cant keep going on like this. I became very scared that if I was already like this at 23 how bad could it become in the future.

    Today my mum is opening a bank account for me and will be in complete control of my finances. She doesn't know about the gambling problem she just thinks I spend a lot and now I want to save. I know I do not have the ability to control those urges if I have the money on me.

    Im feeling really determined this time to stop for good. This is the first time I have gone to seek help and already the posts and experiences here are helping me.

    Excited and nervous to be taking this journey with you all.
    0 x
    Natalie or Nat
    Junior Member
    Posts: 4
    Joined: Sun Oct 13, 2013 11:42 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Dec 05, 2019 12:58 am

    Hi I'm a 39 year old who has been here before. I thought my problem was no more did GA 9 years ago and was going well but slowly it crept up on me again. I feel guilty after going to the pokies but then I get more money out to try and win what I loose. It's not a daily thing but I can feel like I'm getting into old habits. I've had a lot going on this year and struggling with everything. My Pop and Dad passed away this year as well as other personal stuff. I know I'll be ok but using the self help and forums. Hopefully achieving my goals
    0 x

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