It's a frightening addiction

Is someone you care about experiencing issues with gambling? Come in here to discuss your concerns and get some helpful tips.

Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Ami » Fri Mar 18, 2016 9:28 am

I'm trying jo-anne. I really am. But it's bloody hard. Like last night he was in a bad mood because he was tired of working 7 days a week and for nothing. He keeps falling over, but won't utilize everything there to help. I've been asking him to tell the people around him, so they can help, if his boss knew he would let him take time out to see someone or make calls during work. But he refuses. I worked over 40hr last week jst to pay the bills and buy food. I don't have anything left for fuel or phone credit. He took money that wasn't his and gambled it, then when he got paid yesterday he had to give it all back. So now he has zero for two weeks. While the servo bill gets bigger with his fuel and smokes. His rego us due next week, he is pulling me down with him. But I can't break down or get weak because to him I have the simple life free of addiction. So why should I have a bad day? He doesn't get that this is killing me as well. I'm struggling to keep us afloat. I really am. He talks about going to sleep and never waking up. He says it like it wouldn't effect me. I spend hours at work struggling not to break down after he tells me he wants to kill himself. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't force him to call someone. I feel so lost. I'm struggling today, but time
Ami
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Jo-Anne » Thu Mar 17, 2016 5:47 pm

Hi Ami, I am happy to hear that. It will take a while, but the urges do get less over time. It is a difficult time for both of you. It is nice that you are sticking by your partner. Best wishes to you both.
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Ami » Wed Mar 16, 2016 10:05 am

Yesterday he came home from work and said he has signed up on the gamblers help website. I breathed a sign of relief when he made that move. He will say he will do something but doesn't or puts it off. Finally he has out his foot down and made a choice. I just hope he sticks to it. That's his problem, he gets bored or distracted and doesn't stick to things. Like he did 5 days of the 100 day challenge then just stopped writing. When it helped for a little while. He couldn't beat this on his own. It's to strong. I just hope what ever he does helps, because gambeling has changed him. But after 8 months we finally were able to be intimate. He could never be close to me because of the stress and thoughts in his head.
I hope he gets better, for to long I've been strong for him and it's bloody worn me down :(
Ami
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Jo-Anne » Sun Mar 13, 2016 3:38 pm

Hi Ami....Yes it is difficult. I am in a remote area so I understand. The specialised gambling counselling is so good though, because they are so experienced with gambling addiction. In this early stage it would be great if your partner could talk to the helpline. They will probably suggest phone or e-mail counselling, and honestly that works. Please consider this, even for yourself! Well done to your partner for admitting he cannot do it alone. That is the most important step in recovery.....I'm looking forward to hear how you are both doing :)
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Ami » Sun Mar 13, 2016 3:29 pm

Good news. He has agreed to seek professional help. He has admitted he can't fight on his own anymore.
Only problem is there is no where for us to go in our area. I think face to face would benefit us most because he has made it clean that he wants me to go with him when he sees someone.
But I can't find anywhere. 😦
Ami
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Jo-Anne » Sun Mar 13, 2016 11:57 am

Hi Ami, Are you able to get on your own and call the helpline?.....I really think it is the best option at the moment, as you need the support to get through. I'm sorry I can't suggest anything else to help right now as I do not wish to give any bad advice. Look after yourself first, you need that strength right now. All the best to you both.
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Ami » Sun Mar 13, 2016 11:36 am

Last night he had another episode. Saying he wanted this pain to end and he wanted to kill himself so he can get some peace.
Breaks my heart to hear him speak like that, I begged him to get help, to see someone but he is scared. He doesn't want to be put on drugs (that's his trigger, drugs and alcohol)
He still refuses to tell anyone, I hate that's it's all on me to take on all this. I know if he told the people around him they would stand by his side but he won't tell anyone. Or let me tell anyone. He desperately wants to do this on his own, but he can't, not if suicide is his easy way out.
He started to fight his gambeling then he stopped drinking two days ago and stopped smoking weed, and he is spinning out. He is making the right decisions but the voices in his head tell him to give up.
What can I do? He won't see a Dr he won't call a hot line he won't tell his family. Is it hopeless now??
Ami
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Ami » Mon Feb 22, 2016 11:22 am

No no messages
Ami
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby sj » Sat Feb 20, 2016 11:37 pm

Hi ami i tried to pm you. Did it work?
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Re: It's a frightening addiction

Postby Suzy1 » Sat Feb 06, 2016 9:38 pm

Well that is scary alright but he is lucky to have you to help him over it. I have felt suicidal at times when I was fully in my addiction but now I've stopped awhile I'm getting stronger. I'm sure there are many suicides related to gambling but it doesn't get recorded and sometimes no one knows why. You have done what you can and now you're on here maybe you can get him to take the 100 day challenge because that's what helped me most. He might need counselling too do he can talk to someone objective. All the best
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