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Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Menz199 » Wed Jan 24, 2018 6:52 pm

Thanks Jeddie, doing well,


Day 4- keeping strong and feeling good
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Menz199 » Fri Jan 26, 2018 10:03 pm

Ok, so I'm doing good, I missed a day 😛, but I'm still going strong, did some gardening yesterday, and helped dad with stuff, and more house work,

Day 6-still going strong, almost a week :D
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Mona58 » Fri Jan 26, 2018 10:11 pm

Well done,. Thomas!

Always have strategies in place... urges can hit suddenly. The daily SMS support really helps. Sort of gives something to focus on for strengthening recovery.

Stay strong!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Menz199 » Sun Jan 28, 2018 9:16 pm

Hi All
Day 8- I've lasted a week gamble free, I feel great, spent today with my sister as was her birthday today, other than that, just either helping dad or gardening, just mainly waiting to go back to work, but I have to wait for the boss to get back to me.
Day 8- I've lasted a week yay, go me 😀
Hope your all doing well.
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Menz199 » Wed Jan 31, 2018 9:22 am

Feeling crap today, as I spent money that wasn't mine, feeling a little better as I type, feeling shot, tired, miserable, and just really unsure on the next step, I mean, I just not sure what to do next, as I said around the vicious circle I go, with no means of escape, aside from that my day was good, I really enjoyed driving that cab, (job) it made me have purpose, meaning to my life, but last night I did feel a little bit like throwing in the towel, ending it all, I was just feeling crap, was hyperventilating, and my mind was just all over the place, I didn't know what to do,eventually I did do the right thing and go to hospital but it was hard. I've also been talking to a counselor on here, which has helped

(this is pinched from my diary but feel like I need to share it on here.)

Day 11 but it really feels like day 0 again.
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Mona58 » Wed Jan 31, 2018 10:49 am

Well done for resisting that urge! It feels terrible and frightening!

Your post reminded me of my day 10 and day 17 GF. Day 10:- l was at my doctors bawling my eyes out and told her about my gambling problem. Day 17:- was the first time I'd walked past the venues on payday to go shopping on my own! Oh... that was as you have just described!

I AM So proud of You! You did not give in to that bloody gamble demon! Well done Thomas! You did all the right steps!

It will ... should.. be easier from now on... You know what is going to happen when the next urge hits and be perhaps able to breathe through it...

It doesn't seem to matter whether we have had a good day or a bad day... These urges come when we least expect them .I know its more deep rooted than to say it is out of "habit" but habit is a word easiest to grasp. It takes So much time and effort to change our thinking.

Well done for day 11. Hope your journey gets smoother henceforth!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Menz199 » Sun Feb 04, 2018 8:55 pm

Day 15- man have I been so slack in writing, I've been feeling a lot better these past few days, aside from some bad indigestion, still staying strong as best I can, mostly reading and out gardening.
Thanks for the continued support MONA, it really helps,
Day 15- staying strong as best I can.
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby DFP » Sun Feb 04, 2018 9:54 pm

Congratulations, you are doing great. Stay strong, stay focused, keep working hard. All the best for the coming week.
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby Menz199 » Mon Feb 05, 2018 10:01 pm

Day 16 feeling great
Feeling a lot better today, and although I didn't do much today, I still feel good, I mostly spent the day in the garden, and this evening I went to GA, but this time was different, I felt really invigorated coming out this time round as we had a good dicussion on money, and what it makes us feel, and how even though people may get a lot it still won't make them happy,

Example: Someone lived in a caravan park looking after 3 grandchildren in a very small cabin, they are retired now and have a large house but are still the same as they always were,

and another thing, unless you want to change you won't, you need to want to change in order to change (hope that makes sense)

You can try and change a person but unless their willing to change themselves they won't.

For example, I've wanted to quit Gambling, but have had difficulty in seeking help, without being pushed by others, but now after tonight I want to change myself for me.

Except I hit a snag, I told this to mum and told her for the first time in 3 months I've felt really good (mentally) in terms of quitting gambling, but she dimissed me, and said 'until you fall off the horse again' I understand what she means of course, (lapsing) but how can I show others who's trust I've broken, that I want to change.
Because I've lapsed so many times before but how can I show others that I can change.

It's a tough question and just unsure what to do next in regards to the conversation.

A man also talked about a talk he had listened to 'Alan Watt' was his name, I can't quite remember to much what he said but, it was interesting and I will do some research on him tomorrow, and anything useful I will post here, or I may start a new post, but more than likely it will be here.

Day 16- Feeling Energetic and awesome and want to smash the gambling demon in the face.

Thanks for the continued support and sorry I've been slack in writing, but I'm sure this post might make up for missed posts 😛😛😀😀
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Re: Day 1 starting over again, for like the umpteenth time

Postby DFP » Tue Feb 06, 2018 5:06 am

Hi Menz
In terms of the question, how can I show others that I have changed, I would say that you do that through your actions and that it will take time. You lost people's trust over months and years, and it will take the same or longer to get it back. But as you continue to not gamble for months and then years, and as you rediscover the real you, you will earn the trust back. It will take time, and be through actions rather than any words you come up with at this time to try to convince them.
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