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  • Road to recovery 2

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    Keeton
    Senior Member
    Posts: 154
    Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2014 2:19 pm

    Road to recovery 2

    Sat Aug 08, 2015 11:37 pm

    The other topic was a bit long I just moved it into this one.

    So far so good. I can't say much today because i'm currently sick at the moment but once i'm better i will be posting regularly and just talking about pretty much whats on my mind and what i would like to discuss also. I hope my former posts have helped someone because it helped me in a way and i'm almost there.

    If you believe you can achieve,

    Til next time

    Keeton

    PS no gambling today. awesome
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    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1709
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Sun Aug 09, 2015 5:22 pm

    Well done..everyday without gambling is a good day..
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    Keeton
    Senior Member
    Posts: 154
    Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2014 2:19 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Mon Aug 10, 2015 9:50 pm

    I'm in a good place at the moment even though i had a relapse today. I had a very hard time resisting due to the fact I was ill and excited all at once. It was just the trigger that got me to drive down the road and play those stupid machines again. What a fail that was. I'm just annoyed that I lost $200 earned pay to a machine. I was doing so well and its just annoying that I have another week of regrets before i can try again to stop.

    Anyway other than that mishap I'm doing really well. I have started to get the real me back again. I am finding that i'm just enjoying the simple things in life and looking forward to things besides gambling. Quitting gambling is the hardest thing I've ever had to do, and I've even done exams that weren't this stressful. I know that I can do it and that I know that Keeton has come back again to be rid of this horrible addiction that has consumed me in every way. i was like a zombie most of the time. Living day at a time waiting to get my fix on the pokies. IT STOPS NOW. I have resisted urges to gamble so I am determined to keep trying because life without gambling is worth fighting for.
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    Keeton
    Senior Member
    Posts: 154
    Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2014 2:19 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Tue Aug 11, 2015 9:33 am

    I've just been thinking a lot about money lately. It's just rediculous that I may go to a shop and go whoa $50 for that, i don't think I will buy that. And then I will go and gamble and that same note would be straight in the machine without even a second thought. Pokies and gambling does that to me. I can be very wise with money in a shop but once i'm in a pokie room all that goes out the window and I just keep feeding those machines with my hard earned money for nothing in return. It's very annoying. Yes I do choose to do it but deep down I know that I don't enjoy losing and know that I can't make money off them. I just need to get that cemented into my subconscous.
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    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1709
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Tue Aug 11, 2015 10:16 am

    I absolutely agree Keeton..I used to never worry about how much money I fed to the pokies but I would question everything else I bought..not that I had much to spend because it all went on the pokies..no more though..I like feeling good about myself and not worrying about the money I lost and then pay day coming and the cycle starts again..sorry you had a relapse but pick yourself yp dust yourself off and start again..you CAN Do this..we all can
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    Keeton
    Senior Member
    Posts: 154
    Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2014 2:19 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Tue Aug 11, 2015 7:28 pm

    Yeah it is pretty bad. It's annoying that they can do that to us but as i know, they will always win in the end. Thats what they are mean't to do and they always will. It's just a lot harder to quit than I imagine because it became normal to go week after week with no money even when I dreaded it and felt depressed. What makes me angry is that once payday comes I get excited and relieved and resort back to gambling again even when I know it is taking me nowhere.

    After the mishap yesterday I even got manipulated into playing keno again that I haven't played in a while. All that resulted in me betting higher per game and that $5 limit I fooled myself into having became the $40 I had left over from my pay. A hard lesson but after recovering from it I feel ok and am optimistic with the fact that at least it wasn't heaps and I didn't play pokies today. I just cannot gamble at all because gone are the days where I can gamble responsibly anymore. I'm just a full blown binge gambler and I need to stop going back to gambling because life is great without gambling. While it may be tough i am focused on finding a better life and keeping the real me not letting him go again.]

    It just has to and will not continue. Maybe it didn't work out for me this week but I still am as determined as ever and know that life without gambling is worth pursueing.

    All the best

    Keeton
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    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1709
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Tue Aug 11, 2015 8:50 pm

    Keeton that is all you can do..get up dust yourself off and keep going..its all we can do..but I can honestly say by coming here every day it strengthens my resolve to never feed those poker machines again..My life and finances went pear shaped a long time ago and Im not sure if the financial side can be fixed any time soon but I will get my life back
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    Dave68
    Senior Member
    Posts: 320
    Joined: Sun Jan 26, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Wed Aug 12, 2015 11:52 pm

    Hi Keeton......sorry to hear about the relapse, but as we all know it's just a speed bump on the road to getting these things out of our life.

    Now i don't know if you're the sort of person who gets the adrenaline rush from the gambling, or the games themselves, but facebook does have a few casinos that are free to play, one is Heart of Vegas which has almost all of the Aristocrat games i used to blow so much money on over recent years. But you can play them for free with tokens, and not spend a cent. I've played them perhaps in the last few weeks, and it's funny, i can enjoy them but still have no inclination to actually gamble or go into a venue and play with money. So if the games themselves can provide the rush, that's a way you could get some sort of kick, but not spend a cent.

    As you know i've not played since April 2014, but i do think now that i have been able to convince myself how bad it's been for me to waste my money, i have overcome the desire and indeed the link to putting money into a machine. I am probably more one who likes the games, hence the facebook thing is quite good for me. My friend asked if i wanted to come in with him to a venue a couple of weeks ago, but being home, and rather tired (plus the footy was on) i didn't go in.

    So depending on what might work for you, that could be an option. At least you can play the games and not spend anything...although if it's the buzz of the winning of money, it may not be the way. But you just have to convince yourself that gambling just will not work, only if you're the venue owner or the government. They will always take money off the players.
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    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1709
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Thu Aug 13, 2015 8:19 am

    Hi Keeton..just pick up the pieces dust yourself off.and keep going..just regard it as a minor setback and dont let the feeling of guilt consume you.You can do this with your resolve and our support.
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    Keeton
    Senior Member
    Posts: 154
    Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2014 2:19 pm

    Re: Road to recovery 2

    Thu Aug 20, 2015 11:02 pm

    thanks for the support guys it is appreciated.

    I just have say that "when gambling goes away, life takes it's place". Well thats what i have found recently. I was thought to believe that without gambling it would be impossible but it has been amazing. Life is great without gambling to worry about. i even tried that heart of vegas app that dave suggested but just found that I'm bad at that as well. I just cannot and do not like gambling whatsoever. They provide nothing for me and give me a bit of a rush but ultimately take my money or anything else they can too. I looked at the itunes list of top grossing apps and I found that 5 of the top ten were gambling related. When did we get the idea that it is ok to lose money and yes there may be other that believe that it is fun but I don't think so at all. I'm over them and I won't be going back to them if i can help it. I not saying that I won't gamble again but i'm positive that I certainly won't gamble any time soon. I hope that others reading this realise that life without gambling is worth fighting for and just don't give up the fight because while it may take some determination i know we can all do it we just have to believe and keep trying.

    The sky is the limit, not gambling. and the real me has returned for good.

    All the best,

    Keeton
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