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  • Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    Lucas
    Junior Member
    Posts: 3
    Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 12:56 pm

    Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Thu Feb 21, 2013 1:50 pm

    So after contemplating this for months, i am finally here, I have found it a little help looking at other peoples stories so thanks for that.

    So i guess its time for mine, I started gambling about 18 months ago, after years of having an on and off again addiction to amphetamines, I found controlling drug and alcohol use much easier than this gambling thing, I dont think i ever let my self spiral this bad, mind you i had been a regular user since i was around 14, and i never really pushed my self to the limits that i push my self with gambling now. I remember starting gambling as i started an online betting account to have a random bet here and there on music related things and the ocassional bet on AFL, i remember my first bet when i was 16, i went to the local TAB with my mum and I (mind you in school uniform) put on a bet of $10 for a horse to win that was paying 100 for a win, I won, and never really gambled again that i could remember, apart from the occasional social pokie use, which was with my mum, who had a horrible problem and did horrible things to feed her abuse, which eventually led to me breaking down by the time was 17 and led me to experiment more in drug use. anyway back to the gambling, about 18 months ago, i found my self in a situation i had not been in a while, long term unemployed, recently seperated from my partner and having to give in to the feeling of having to move back to Victoria after a while of living interstate with my son and feeling on top of the world and only really having my self as support and feeling like i was succesing, i then had to bring my son back to victoria, i went back to wa, i lasted only a few months before i came back, the next couple of years where soooo up and down, i struggled with a few things, but always seemed to get back on top, anyway, bout 18 months ago after about 4 months of not having a steady job, i found my self with a large sum of cash and a temp job, as some sort of tradition, id enjoy that first lot of pay, i logged in to my online betting account and started seeing you could bet on horses and such online, i instantly thought of the time i first won. anyway, over the next few days i lost 400 and decided that was that, it was a little fun but i couldnet bear to part with money again. time pass and i find my self jobless again, but find a job pretty quick, i loved this job a great deal, first month was fantastic, but as i was a manager, i had to go to get change, sometimes walking into the city was a massive task so my area manager always said go to the local tab to get change as they are more thna happy to help, so that i did, so i started having a little bet here and there, no real wins, but started realising i had gambled my transport and food money. I then started taking petty cash, and within a few weeks, i noticed it all had gone, i also noticed i had a couple of big wins, and stopped walking away, kept gambling the next day and such, i started getting to the point where i would not eat for days and my rent would not be paid, i then decided the only option i had was to start delaying the banking of the days taking, i did this for 2 weeks, operating a few days behind, and gambling the days takings, shutting up early to go gamble, i would then win back a certain ammount and go bank it. another couple of weeks pass and i start to realise this is becoming a problem and i had taken now in the area of around 4k out of takings, i go gamble to try win back my losses and shut early, i lose, i then go into the safe and take the last of the cash, i some how start winning, i go back home and continue gambling into the night. by nights end, i find my self up to around 10k. this was the first time i had felt relif, i thought it was time to go, so the next day after an enjoyable day, i put everything back and not gamble, finish at a normal time, then realise i still have a huge sum of money i then lose it all, i then take the current weeks taking, which is considerbly bigger, and lose it all. i instantly run back to my place of work and throw up. realisin
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    BriM
    Senior Member
    Posts: 384
    Joined: Wed Dec 05, 2012 3:05 pm

    RE: Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Fri Feb 22, 2013 9:59 am

    Hi Lucas,

    Wow, that's quite a story. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. It's a huge step you've taken, and I'm glad that you've been able to find some comfort and encouragement in reading other members' stories.

    You say that in the recent past your family and friends who were aware of your gambling never stepped in to take your pay or stop you. How do you feel about the support that the people close to you are giving you at the moment? Do you think that if you yourself initiated the conversation around them helping you in some way (whether it be hanging onto your pay, or providing you with encouragement or something else) that they would give you a hand?

    Even though I'm sure you feel pretty low at the moment, you should feel proud that you've had the courage to reach out. That's the first step.

    Bri
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    GameChanger (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 156
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 1:48 pm

    RE: Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Fri Feb 22, 2013 6:09 pm

    Hi Lucus, I want to echo the thoughts of Brion, thank you for your courage in sharing your story. I have to say that reading your post was really difficult and left me with a really sick feeling: I can only imagine what you must be going through at the moment.

    For what it's worth, the guys at gamblinghelpline, are great, they're all trained counsellors that are very familiar with what gambler's struggle with on a daily basis. I'd strongly encourage you contact them by phone 1800 858 858 or by online-chat on http://www.gamblinghelponline.org.au/ac ... unselling/.

    I can hear that you haven't had the best of luck recieving offers of help from others, but I'm certain that you'll have a positive response from the guys at gamblinghelpline and also by the members on this forum!
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    doug
    Senior Member
    Posts: 366
    Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:51 pm

    RE: Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Tue Feb 26, 2013 12:00 pm

    thanks for coming to this site Lucas, which might sound a little weird. But you are helping others allready here by sharing your experiences. Your even helping me to be reminded to keep my own chit together.

    As for you,, it sounds like you made a very postitive step, even if its just a start, its a very big step,, and you should feel good about that..good job man.
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    Doug who's the good dog?
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    Angelina.
    Senior Member
    Posts: 326
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 1:43 pm

    RE: Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Tue Mar 05, 2013 6:00 am

    I agree with you Doug, right on; asking for help can be really scary. Thanks for being supportive : )
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    Lucas
    Junior Member
    Posts: 3
    Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 12:56 pm

    RE: Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Fri Mar 08, 2013 1:40 pm

    Thanks for the replys, I am now looking at this site more, mainly after i lose, but I am still looking at it, I am remiaing hopeful that I can pull my self out of this situation, I recently gambled all my holiday pay away, on the verge of losing my house yet again and my son is bout to be kicked out of daycare as i have not paid the bill. I tried to get help again today in my town via local services, and was reminded yet again of how easy it is to gamble rather than find an avenue to quit. I booked an appointment at a local service to get some help with food and see if i can get a referel to someone to help with my gambling problem, i was told the most they could do for me is give a $20 food voucher, be put on a waiting list to talk to someone about my gambling problem (which was 10 months!!!) and an appointment to see a counseller, which was for 6 weeks time, i was told i was not in the funding bracket and pretty much just rushed aside. at work on a daily basis, i see these local orgnisations pretty much help other people who want help wether it be just a bit of a support and financial advice, and will pretty much rush to there aid, this just makes me feel like i have to lose a complete grip of everything before anyone will stop in to help, I have found it hard to ask for help, but every time i seem to, i feel like im being told im fine and it will blow over. by all means, i wish that would happen, but i see peoples posts on here about decades of gambling and i think how on earth can you guys survive! thats amazing in its self, and all i can think bout is if i stop gambling,everything i have learnt about basic day to day survival, will pretty much help me through life, but some days it feels like im ready, i will go days without gambling, i take it one day at a time, and that was helping, then i get money in my hand, and then its back to it just being gone, ive tried to lower my bets again, tried doing the things that made it fun, tried timing it, but i just keep withdrawing my self more and more, and today i went for help because I am scared of losing my son due to my gambling, i actually feel like its going to happen, i feel for the first time I am withdrawing my self from him and i just feel like at any moment, i wont be able to spend as much time with him. I know I only have my self to blame, but at the moment i feel so much anger to the betting agencys, i really wish they would make it harder to gamble, or atleast show a duty of care, i know they are there to make money, but if gambling is one of the biggest factors to sucide in men in this country, then why the hell are they making more money than ever? but seem to be actually doing less, i notice now gamblers are getting younger and spending more and this really angers me that it is all so glorified here. I really disagree with gambling commercials, you cant advertise ciggeretes, alcohol advertising is minimal but advertising for gambling seems to be at an all time high but in that sense to, they seem to be matched by anti gambling ad's, but i still find it harder to find avenues to quit. it should be harder to gamble than what it is to not gamble
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    GameChanger (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 156
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 1:48 pm

    RE: Hi I am Lucas, I am 31 and Gambling is well on its way to destroying life as i Know it

    Fri Mar 08, 2013 5:24 pm

    I can really sense your frustration right now; that your efforts to find help from local services are going largely unheard at the moment. I can imagine that you're feeling like the seriousness of your situation is not being taken as seriously as it should. For what it's worth, by contacting Gambler's helpline in your state or territory on 1800 858 858, the staff there can put you in touch with support in your area, or even work with you over the phone to support you in your way forward. But I really take my hat off to you for having the guts to reach out for help at all. Given what you've written in your first post, it seems like a massive step for you to take, to reach out to local services. It's also really encouraging to hear that you're checking out the different posts that others are writing on this forum too. I can also hear your outrage that venues don't do more to restrict gamblers from spending money; a feeling that I'm sure is reflected by other gamblers. I'd be really interested to hear from others out there, for any similar experiences and most of all for support for a fellow member in need.
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