big time low
im new to this so here it goes
my problem had started probably over 7 years ago with gambling too much mainly on horses/dogs before that it was the social punt on a saturday with mates with small amounts of money , but after injuring my self through sport which was my main focus and main dedication i lost my way felt lost and helpless and angry with the world id say as it took away from me where i wanted to be. so i started gambling more and more higher amounts got to a point where i had no debt to losing weekly wage then getting credit cards e.t.c to fuel the habitat till a point i couldn't pay back debts and feeling sick and angry again. i have always been like a team player in sports kept me busy and focussed as a hobby but then this **** took over after a few wins thinking it was easy. eventually got the courage to talk to my mum where she helped me through she was shocked at first but helped me through it ended up giving her control of my accounts which stopped me from spending more then i could. this was all good for 2 years even know i didnt stop gambling all together over that time i only spent minimal when out with mates, had no apps to access to gamble on horses/dogs, but i didnt feel the urge.
anyway 3 years ago started my own bussiness everything was good, i was happy had a goal to achieve wasn't gambling and i actually nearly had all my debts paid off. this was untill i got stuffed over on a job the owner would not pay the amount left on the job which left me to try and fight him in court over the space of a year the amount is just to much to handle after putting everything into my business trying to survive it i woke up on morning to see i had nothing left even after doing all the right things in my life and not gambling, i spose it was like a trigger for me i was angry, hated the world etc so i started gambling again as i was working hard to get money in chasing loses again.
its got to a point now back in the same boat i feel sick, depressed and anxiety levels through the roof.
anyone else get triggers like these and know how to stop it ???
anyone else bet high amounts of money winning then chasing loses?? spending all there time on form etc watching races every day trying to find the next best thing???
i really hate this feeling i have and most people dont know and i am embarrassed about the whole thing. its got to a point where i probably lose everything it make me sick in the guts.