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Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Tue Jun 23, 2020 7:41 am
by Liz83
Thanks everyone for the comments and suggestions.
For me spare time is not the issue. I have three young children (4, 6 and 8 months old) and work part time so barely get time to myself but when I do get a small break I find it very hard to do something positive for myself instead of gambling. There are a lot of things I know I would enjoy doing but the lure of pokies at the moment is so strong.
In 2 hours I managed to nearly completely deplete what I saved in the last 6 months (which Thankfully wasn’t a huge amount considering I was on maternity leave and working part time) but now I feel like I’m desperate to chase back the loss.
Last night I talked to my husband about it which I know is the first step to making this right again instead of falling into a deep dark spiral again.
I’m very lucky to have such a supportive man in my life. I will give him the cards and limit my access to cash which I know is the only way for me to really limit it.
I just feel so angry that it was this great feeling of freedom while they were closed. Like its very unfair we have to live somewhere where they are just everywhere!!!

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Tue Jun 23, 2020 10:04 am
by pamela
Well done on talking to your husband and asking for his help.
I understand with 3 small children how you look forward to time for yourself,but there are other things you can do,,eg the movies
Certainly limiting you cash and not carrying cards is a good start.
And yes they are everywhere .
Its like everything I suppose,making a choice ,
For example ,I see McDonald's everywhere I go,but I choose not to have it,
It really is about changing up our habits.
Its tough.its frustrating,.its hard,but can be done
You are heading in the right direction so be strong and say no to gambling today
You can do this

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Tue Jun 23, 2020 4:37 pm
by Liz83
I think McDonalds is very different to gambling.
Not an addiction.
Do you think that gambling is not an addiction?
I have struggled with it for nearly 20 years and I find it very very different to just resisting temptations and having self control.

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Tue Jun 23, 2020 11:57 pm
by pamela
I was using McDonald's as an example,and no I don't think Maccas is an addiction.
I gambled for 18 years,I know how hard it is to stop,it was pure torment driving past my favourite venues,so, I went different ways to and from work.
Sure they are tempting..but the fun doesn't last.
As hard as it is,you can do it
Believe in yourself ,

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Wed Jun 24, 2020 8:09 am
by Mona58
Hi Liz.

Maybe you could look into "dopamine" = the pleasure receptor of the brain.

Another example may be right in front of you = your children. Notice how "excited" they are about something that gives them ''pleasure" .. they ask for the same thing again and again --. can even be -Maccas chicken nuggets (my grandson went through this one) Ipads, games, toys, blankets the list goes on. ' How long do they cry...throw tantrums when they are depraved of anything that gives "pleasure" Is up to us as parents. We either give in... or replace the "addiction" with something healthier. This IS what We need to do to ourselves... get through our tantrums without giving in to them.

Mona (2 years 8 months gamble free)

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Wed Jul 01, 2020 11:22 pm
by Under the rug
I have struggled big time since they have been open again, first night they were back open I was there. In the last 4 weeks I would say I’ve lost over 5000. Could be more. I’ve lost all self control and I don’t know what other options there are for me. There would be nights where I’d be dissapointed apt losing 250-300 at a time. It’s 1000 trip every time now. It’s numbing and at that point you just lose all respect for money

I’m sick and tired of this recurring vicious cycle and just wish it never started from the beginning. I know I have a choice. I can say no. But my mind just won’t let me

I really don’t know what else to do. I’ve lost all intrest in the hobby’s I used to do. I don’t have many friends, I don’t have a girlfriend. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for a number of years also.The reason I do play is to kill time and kill boredom.

I need suggestions..

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Thu Jul 02, 2020 7:47 am
by Mona58
Hi "under the rug"

l posted these in another tread but thought I'd put them here also because it does take time to find the way through the many treads on the forum.

it helps to read and re read our own posts and pick at our own words. You said "your mind won't let you" stop. And I thought those links will help UNDERSTAND why.

We are in precarious times right now but finding NEW things to do help. Don't be too hard on yourself ' I know it is easier said than done but recovery is a slow process. We see the "outside" of people and "envy" their "stable life" But do we really know what they are going through any more than they can see our inner turmoil? what we see in others is ourselves. Life ... living ... is all '"work in progress". It never really stops! Go for walks .--put music on dance like no One can see you... Laugh at and wlth yourself. Cook new stuff. Join a "charity group Help others to help yourself.

All the best on your journey! stay strong! You had strength and power to post draw from this!


Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Thu Jul 30, 2020 7:59 pm
by Witch for the bitch
I just wanted to feel other people’s stories as I believe I’ve once again about to hit rock bottom n I’m terrified cause I’ve been there before with my alcoholism.
I’m nine yes sober but have totally swapped the witch for the *****.
I’ve got the same addiction for pokies. Same hatred of myself. Same belief that I can control or limit my gambling.same resignation that I’ll do it again and again, any winnings gone and bank account empty.
I’ve tried everything I learnt in a.a.
I know I’m powerless over pokies, when they were shut life was great. As soon as an opening date was announced the obsession was there.
I am a max better and whatever I win will go back in plus everything else.
I’m trying this forum, to once again be among people who have the same problem and are dealing with it, sharing hope.
Please chat.

Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Fri Jul 31, 2020 8:51 am
by Mona58

Well done on 9 years sobriety! l am in 15 years and heading to 3 years gamble free come October.

The forums get very quiet at the best of times, There is a post by Sticky Chicken titled Helping out a friend which I think would help your situation if this person returns to chat.

We do have a very quiet Chatty Tuesday from 8 till 10pm. It would be wonderful if people would actual "Chat" ... I guess most people are shy and wary or just simply don't know what to say.

Reading posts and knowing you are not alone is major first step. The "higher power" guided you to this forum and I hope you will continue to contribute and share your journey with us! We are all here silently encouraging and supporting you!

All the best on your journey!


Re: Post lockdown set back

Posted: Sat Aug 01, 2020 1:10 pm
by gzy3
Hi @Witch for the ***** , welcome to this forum.

I am one of the moderators on this forum.
It seems you feel powerless and no control of your gambling. It may be helpful to be curious about what underlies your gambling for a long term recovery.
What do you think you are filling in with it?

The thread @Mona58 suggested is on here .

I hope you find this forum helpful and supportive, and learn from other members and share your stroy too.
Again, welcome to this forum. You have already taken a big step to tackle with your gambling concern.