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  • New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    rainbowsunsets
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Thu Feb 06, 2020 7:12 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Feb 06, 2020 7:20 pm

    Hi,

    My name is Sarah. I am married without children. I just admitted to my husband and family last weekend that I have gambled $50,000 over a year on online sports.

    I’m not even into sports except tennis. What really scares me is that I had unrestricted sole access to $250,000 and I could have just lost it all.
    It started off innocent and then I kept trying to chase the losses and got addicted along the way.

    I’m seeing a psychologist for this.

    I’m so lucky that my husband and family are very supportive. However, I still get urges and still want to gamble. We have put exclusions in place and taken money away from me.

    I just don’t know what to fill my life in the evening with and my weekend with now that I don’t have it.....I feel lost and miss it.

    That’s my honest story.
    5 x
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1786
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Fri Feb 07, 2020 9:41 am

    Hi Sarah..well done on admitting your problem.and how lucky ate you to have the support of your family.
    Trying to replace gambling is half the battle..but if you like reading..read a book..try your hand at crosswords ..or watched movie or even better go for a walk..there are many activities it's just a matter of finding something you like to do
    Good luck
    1 x
    Sunflower
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Sat Feb 08, 2020 8:56 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Sun Feb 09, 2020 3:27 pm

    Hi Everyone,

    I joined last night after spending all day gambling at a local Venue playing the pokies. I thought this would be a good way to overcome my problem and help my mental health by sharing my story and getting inspiration from others.

    I am 29 years old and I've had a gambling problem on and off for about 7 years. Yesterday I lost $4000 over the last 2 days. I wouldn't be able to tell you how much I have lost all up..it's tens of thousands!! This problem is affecting my life in so many ways. I have isolated myself from doing anything because I feel that I need to punish myself every time I gamble and I should just stay home and try to save the money that I lost. I have turned into a person that is greedy and obsessed with money which I hate myself for. I have been out of control for the past year and a half after the loss of a very close family member. I can go weeks without playing (even though I have the constant urge) where I start to feel good again, save money, and then I just stuff up when the thought of gambling comes to my mind. The thought of winning back losses, the thought of winning extra cash so I can spend money on materialistic things, the thought of paying off debts, the thought of escaping from my sadness and isolation. All these things come to my mind when I get the urge. I promise myself every time that I am going to stop but I never stick to it. I know I need to stop and I know I can't keep doing this as it is ruining my life and I'm spiraling into a deep depression .
    No one knows about my gambling addiction and I would be too ashamed to tell anyone. I want to work this out on my own even though I know talking to family/friends/counselor could help. I am hoping that this post will motivate me to change by acknowledging on this forum that I have a problem and hear from others that are going through the same thing.

    I am going to try and stop gambling completely. Today is Day 1. Whilst I feel like I am going to have an emotional breakdown, I am going to try to be strong and positive and think that today is a new day for me to change. Wish me luck and I hope I do not disappoint myself.
    3 x
    JANUARY20
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Fri Jan 03, 2020 8:47 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Sun Feb 09, 2020 9:40 pm

    @Sunflower I just read your post and all I could think was this is my life, thank you for be so open and sharing. I'm a bit old than you 47 and have been gambling for at least 20 years, like you have I have lost way to much money on these damn things and that in itself is really difficult to live with. My urges are linked to stresses in my life and like you I isolated myself from my friends and family. I gave up 3 months ago and over that time I have had multiple panic attacks but i have finally accepted I have a problem and that I don't want this to be apart my life anymore. I finally took myself off to the doctor a couple of weeks ago to be refered to a psychologist as I realized that my gambling is going hand in hand with my mental health and I really needed to talk about it and find ways to cope and change my life. In saying that we are all different and you may find other ways to cope with quitting. I wish you all the best and I can say that it worth it, I am find ways to cope and they are bring me peace of mind which I have not felt for a really long time.. I am also finding that I am reconnecting with my loved ones and my relationships are slowing becoming stronger which in turn is helping me cope as I am more open with them all about the stresses in my life. Even if you find it hard to talk about your gambling with loved ones maybe you can talk about other things that are making you feel down and this may help with your urges. Take care and be kind to yourself x x
    1 x
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1786
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Sun Feb 09, 2020 10:20 pm

    Hi Sunflower..all of us here have experienced how you feel in one way or another.Admitting you have a problem is a huge step in the right direction.
    If you get a chance try and watch a series called I Win You Lose..its a series ..very eye opening
    And remember these machines are designed to addict..they reel you in and wrap their tentacles around you ..
    Try and seek help ..you can beat this
    3 x
    BrittV (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 485
    Joined: Mon May 14, 2018 11:40 am

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Tue Feb 11, 2020 12:47 pm

    We've had quite a few members join us over the last week so I just want to take a moment to warmly welcome all of you. I'm BrittV - the community mgr.
    Well done to each of you on having the strength to come here, share your story, and take your steps toward change! This is a community of such lovely people who understand what you're feeling and experiencing, I really hope the community helps you to continue forward :)

    A couple of things you may find helpful to know
    • Many find making your own thread as a great way to create a journal of sorts for your journey, but also to get answers and support from others (this intro can get a little crowded, making individual replies a little harder).
    • Building connections with others here can be really helpful in keeping you on track - with so many of you going through your early days at the same time, it's a great idea to chat and support one another.
    • You may like to join us tonight and every tuesday, 6-9pm AEDST for] Chatty Tuesday, to have a casual online chat about our weeks, how things are going and any topic you like!
    Hope this helps! All the best and again, welcome.

    @rainbowsunsets @Sunflower @JANUARY20 @LetsAllstop @Lysdog @BBGamble @Lysdog @BBGamble @Selfish
    1 x
    Sadly, it's my last week as Community Manager. Wishing everyone all the best!
    22Jules
    Junior Member
    Posts: 5
    Joined: Tue Feb 18, 2020 3:24 am

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Tue Feb 18, 2020 4:40 am

    Hi.

    I have just relapsed. I have a self exclusion of 5 years but about a month ago travelled an hour away to a club and won a few bucks ( didn’t loose anyway ) went to a local club that I am excluded from but they didn’t notice or say anything 🤷‍♀️. Had a few wins as you do... only minor, then loss after loss after loss. Had 2k saved up and blew it all this last week 😭 far out. Feeling terrible. Having all the normal thoughts when you loose. Feeling like I’ve let my kids down once again. One club I am excluded from actually did come up and ask me to leave it was 4am about 3 weeks ago I had driven there after the other place closed and they called my counsellor who did contact me to make appointment for last week!! I cancelled due to weather. Man I wish I had gone :( Maybe that call made me go crazy?!? I don’t know like oh quick better do it while I can??? I don’t know that’s all I can think. Disappointed. I know what I need to do. Three years and I still have the same problem not knowing when to stop or not being able too. Just feeding the machine all my money 😭

    Thanks for listening. Now to start again XXX
    2 x
    22Jules
    Junior Member
    Posts: 5
    Joined: Tue Feb 18, 2020 3:24 am

    Re: Last resort

    Tue Feb 18, 2020 4:52 am

    kittykat wrote:
    Thu Nov 21, 2019 9:08 am



    i rang the helpline...now I feel hopeful. I don't feel so alone. Its just the start, I hope i can get help.
    KittyKat .. Just want to ask how are you going?
    0 x
    User 586f218674e86
    Junior Member
    Posts: 7
    Joined: Mon Feb 13, 2017 3:49 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Tue Feb 18, 2020 9:18 pm

    Hi,
    I started gambling about 10 years ago. One of my first bets was a afl multi that 100 won me 5000. Since then ive been hooked. I would say i have lost in excess of 150k as it got really bad in 2015. I spiralled out of control betting no less than 500 per bet on sports. I never liked the cas pokies or horses as i felt i didnt have a chance.
    With sportsbetting i always felt i had an edge that i would read the market inlive play. Watching the teams and who was running harder and using more energy, missing goals blah blah. Alot of times it paid off as i would walk weekends away with 10k or more. I had a run in 2018 over the baseball period i won 32000 in 2 weeks. I was on a complete high. I felt i had the advantage and i was smarter than the bookies.
    Once in 2014 i was watching the eagles play port adelaide, it was half time eagles down by 32 points, i was drunk and i thought i had a sign to put 2000 on the eagles at 12 dollar odds...... eagles won. I was living in another world. Ive never felt like that.
    Long behold reality would strike sooner than later. I would give all the money back and thousands of my own monies.
    I have a good buisness. I can make on a bad year 75k and thats me sitting at home 2 days a week and on a good year in excess of 120k or more.
    My mortgage has not moved for 8 years dues to gambling i should have my house paid a long time ago. I owe over 50k to ato. 10k to cards and a personal loan of 20k.
    Ive had enough. I cant go on doing this crap anymore. I have to draw the line for my future and for my sanity. I have changes over the years as a person. I only feel happy and in control when i win over a weekend when i lose i feel like a failure. The gambling bug has consumed my life and has sucked my happy go lucky personality out of me.
    The depression is the hard part. Dealing with debt when i should he flighing high with success. The remorse is crippling at times. And the worse part about it all is i always feel that this weekend i can get 6k back. I always think i can get it back. Then when my common sence comes to play i realise i have as much of a chance winning lotto. Im not getting my money back. Theres a 100% chance i wont. The only way out is a years and a half solid work and back pay.
    My personality as a person i use to be liked by everyone. Funny and always up for going out and having fun. Now i just want to sit on my couch and watch the sports from the moment i wake up till the moment i shut my eyes and bet .
    My freinds list has shortened to literally 2 people who probally like me. The rest just see me as a sad reclusive person. Its sad because im not.
    Sunday night was my last time betting. Ive had enough and im done with it. I know i have promised myself many times but im done. Enough of feeling like **** enough of living in a fake world enough of working for nothing... ***** the bookies they aint seeing a cent off me again.
    Thats my story. 33 yr old male.
    Thanks for reading
    1 x
    BigSkivz76
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Thu Feb 20, 2020 4:05 pm

    Re: New here? Change makers introduce yourself here!

    Thu Feb 20, 2020 4:29 pm

    Just found this page actually..you know scrolling the net trying to find some inspiration after just losing around $3000 at the pokies...worse thing is I just left my job last week n that was supposed to get me through till I start a new job...n here I am feeling like an absolute loser with no self control who now has to figure out how to pay bills, food, petrol etc with less than $200 in my bank which I nearly walked back in n played thinking that maybe...just maybe I can get all my money back..🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️ 🤦🏼‍♂️ Not the first time it’s happened off course but still never learn my lesson...I’ve played pokies on n off for years...lost alot of money in that time but I also have a problem with certain “substances” which I use on n off that just make me lose all self control on the machines...when I’m high I could feed $1000-$2000+ in a machine n wouldn’t think twice...I know I need to stop using that stuff n my gambling..will stop too but **** ain’t easy...My family don’t know about my addictions..but I’m sure they suspect I’m gambling...sorry for the rant guys...just feel like uppercutting myself at the moment lol
    1 x

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