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  • My tale of stupidity and shame

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    Mona58
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1015
    Joined: Sun Oct 15, 2017 11:44 am

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Tue Nov 20, 2018 4:37 pm

    Well done on 100 days Jamus! It is a huge achievement!

    stay strong!

    Mona
    0 x
    A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
    Change4better
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Wed Dec 05, 2018 10:00 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Wed Dec 05, 2018 10:08 pm

    Thanks for your sharing your story Janus, I have just decided to get help and found your story encouraging.
    Congratulations on your 100 days!
    0 x
    Hedwig
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2018 9:22 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Thu Dec 27, 2018 9:35 pm

    You give me hope. Great work well done!
    1 x
    Jamus
    Junior Member
    Posts: 12
    Joined: Sun Aug 05, 2018 10:13 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Sun Dec 30, 2018 10:02 am

    Hi all,

    Thought its time I give an update. Day 146 today. Had so many thoughts of going back for a quick hit, thinking it will be fine because I have a handle on it now. But I've managed to avoid them completely. Even dodged a mates casino trip that I would have loved to go on, but deep down I know how it ends.

    Been watching plenty of gambling help videos online and I also watch the pokie videos on YouTube of people losing, it's like a free reminder of that feeling when you've lost it all.

    My urges are no where near as strong as they were. In the first few weeks it felt like the car would try and steer itself into the club when driving past.
    Now when I drive past I still feel like I miss the smell of a bourbon and the atmosphere of the gaming room (before the losses begin) and then I remember the feeling of leaving the pokie room, atm daily limit maxed out. No cash in my wallet, feeling of total despair. Wanting to die.
    And that lets me keep driving past.

    Here's to a GF 2019.

    Jamus
    2 x
    dragon007 (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 165
    Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2018 10:07 am

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Sun Dec 30, 2018 10:18 am

    Hi Jamus

    Well done!

    Thank you for sharing your experience.

    It was very insightful to mention the negative feelings that gambling brings as well as the temptations.

    Keep up the great effort.

    Regards
    dragon007
    1 x
    Calvin (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 276
    Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2018 4:01 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Fri Jan 04, 2019 12:23 pm

    Welldone @Jamus keep up the great work!
    1 x
    How the F did I get here
    Senior Member
    Posts: 248
    Joined: Sun Apr 08, 2018 11:05 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Tue Jan 15, 2019 11:13 pm

    Hey Jamus,

    Terrific to see you are still smashing it! Well done. I'm hoping to get back on track too, and hopfully I can turn things around like you seem to be.

    I can relate to the chasing losses with a credit card. I racked up 25k in credit card debt trying to win back 2 years of hard savings.
    Big mistake not cancelling cards that I had previously done balance transfer on.
    All the best keep it up.
    2 x
    Jamus
    Junior Member
    Posts: 12
    Joined: Sun Aug 05, 2018 10:13 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Sun Feb 10, 2019 12:22 am

    188 days down the drain, honestly feel like ending it. What a ******** I am.
    0 x
    How the F did I get here
    Senior Member
    Posts: 248
    Joined: Sun Apr 08, 2018 11:05 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Sun Feb 10, 2019 7:19 am

    Hey Jamus,

    Keep going!! Don't reset. 188 days that's bloody awesome, one little slip up is nothing.
    You should be proud of how far you made it. I think only reset the click if after today you continue gambling, but I slip hell no keep going. Day 189 tomorrow!!

    I know it's easier said than done, but don't go getting into a depressed state, as I know at this stage it's not about the money it's about disappointment in yourself. Because if you get all depressed and angry at yourself for the slip up you will continue to gamble, be proud you got to189.
    Keep pushing!!!
    3 x
    How the F did I get here
    Senior Member
    Posts: 248
    Joined: Sun Apr 08, 2018 11:05 pm

    Re: My tale of stupidity and shame

    Sun Feb 10, 2019 7:22 am

    Also if you are feeling that ****, please call the helpline or get to a GA meeting as soon as possible. All the best, reach out to any of us if you need.
    1 x

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