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Posted: Fri May 25, 2018 3:51 am
I have just been reading through your posts and I have to say, it's a pretty **** deal being a gambler. I have looked at people who don't gamble and I have actually felt resentful toward them because they have never had to deal with the anxiety, stress, financial pressures etc. that I as a gambling addict have had to deal with all of my life. I hear them say things like 'People are so stupid gambling their money like that, they are idiots and deserve to lose everything'! and I silently get so angry with them and I feel like saying 'Well I am sure it wasn't their life long dream to sit alone in front of a Poker machine, stressing out and feeding it every cent they own'. The truth is that everyone hates gamblers except those who understand them... other gamblers. We never 'chose' to be a gamblers, we were born this way. Our brains were wired for addiction from birth, so we were screwed from the get go. Is this our fault? Hell no but that won't stop us being harshly judged by the majority of people who were fortunate enough NOT to be born this way.
This is why gamblers lie and cover up their behavior because they know they will be harshly judged and are embarrassed about their behavior and subsequently suffer in silence for fear of public ridicule and personal attack. We don't get the support and understanding that people with other diseases get which is really unfair but that's just the way it is I am afraid. This is why sites like this are so valuable. This is the one place we gamblers can go to get the truth off our chest, discuss what is really happening and to get some helpful advice. The more gamblers who utilise this site, the better. This is the place where we will build our arsenal against this disease and find the support and understanding we so badly need. This IS our Oasis so use it.
Re: Gamblers Oasis
Posted: Sat May 26, 2018 11:49 am
tennisstar here, one of the senior forum moderators. Thank-you for your post. I'm sensing some frustration on your behalf towards others who do not gamble, and it's understandable to feel that way. It sounds like your gambling has been an unrelenting struggle for you, and feeling angry towards those who lack an understanding of gambling or whom are not gamblers themselves is completely reasonable, particularly as you've been exposed to comments that are quite stigmatizing and hurtful. That must have been really tough. I'm sure that having issues with gambling isn't the trajectory that you chose for yourself. Additionally, I'm certain that other gamblers share your views and experiences, especially around the aetiology of gambling from a biological perspective, which does have a strong evidence-base. Indeed, people who have gambling issues tend to conceal their behaviour and become dishonest due to the stigma perpetuated by society, which only exacerbates the shame experienced by the gambler, and I can understand the inequity and prejudice experienced by yourself and others in your position. This is definitely a place for you to get some support for your gambling and to voice your concerns any time you wish, and I'm really glad you find this forum useful. You can also call the Gambler's Helpline on 1800 858 858 anytime - they're staffed by professional gambling counsellors 24/7, and can work with you collaboratively to help minimize your gambling and do have an understanding of how tough it is to overcome. They can also provide you with a referral to a Gambler's Help agency to get some emotional or financial support from a trained gambling or financial counsellor in your area, and all these services are free of cost. They also have information on Gambler's Anonymous groups and self-exclusion processes (if people are wanting to ban themselves either from an online gambling modality or from a venue, with no cost). Please continue to use this site as often as you like, and I commend you on your courage on reaching out.
Re: Gamblers Oasis
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2019 5:52 pm
Hi persistent, I just want to say that I really enjoyed your post and I sometimes feel the same way. My older brother is very judgemental when it comes to gambling and my former best mate was to (he probably still is I don't know). You know, it's funny though, if I had have won thousands or millions ( or at least in front) it would be an entirely a different story and I would be looked on as some sort of champion or something. One of the barriers they seem to have is ignorance. You know, we all have some sort of addiction. My brother has an addiction and he doesn't even know about it. He's addicted to hooking up with women and having Brady bunch relationships with them. They never work and are doomed for failure from the start because they are based on sex, and the fact that he wants his son to have a family again ( his mother left). He spends a fortune on these women and after a few months to a year, bang! it's over! He may as well put the money he earns down the throat of a pokie
Re: Gamblers Oasis
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 9:49 am
I agree with what you said, about people not understanding this addiction. I myself don't understand it.
Re: Gamblers Oasis
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2019 5:01 pm
I do get why people think pokie players are idiots, I feel like a major idiot and I personally feel more silly having a pokie addiction as opposed to a full blown drug addiction. Addicted to pressing a button for crying out loud WTF!!