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  • Broken

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    User avatar
    Noah (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 308
    Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2012 2:53 pm

    Re: Broken

    Fri Jun 16, 2017 3:47 pm

    Grub wrote:Hi over the last few years i have been gambling on poker machines i started because i was bord now i have managed to spend all our savings credit cards are maxed and my husband has just lost his job and thinks we have money but we dont i am so ashamed and dont know how to tell him what ive done i cant sleep and dont know what to do cant pay our rent i think he will leave me when he finds out feeling sick to my stomach i am such a looser no way out for me .
    Hi Grub,
    Welcome! It sounds like you're feeling really trapped. This is such a common feeling at the early stage of facing a gambling problem. I think when feeling overwhelmed, sometimes just taking a couple of very small steps can help one feel a bit more in control. Perhaps the next step for you might be to make an anonymous and confidential call to Gamblers Helpline: 1800 858 858 and they can help you to explore what options might be available to you. There is free financial counselling as well as gambling specific face to face counselling available all over Australia. You are not alone.
    Keep in touch and let us know how you are going.
    Take care of yourself,
    Noah
    0 x
    User avatar
    Noah (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 308
    Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2012 2:53 pm

    Re: Broken

    Fri Jun 16, 2017 3:54 pm

    Hi Annie,
    Welcome! It sounds like you have already received great support here! And that you've started counselling, though you are not convinced... keep in touch and let us know how it goes. If after a few sessions you are finding that this counsellor is not resonating with you, there is nothing wrong with asking to see someone else who might be a better fit for you. However it can take a while to build up a relationship with a counsellor and counsellors will welcome feedback around what about their approach is/isn't working for you.
    All the best with this and stay in touch!
    Noah
    0 x
    Jussy
    Junior Member
    Posts: 14
    Joined: Fri Jun 16, 2017 11:23 pm

    Re: Broken

    Sat Jun 17, 2017 8:51 am

    Hi Annie.

    This illness is one of the worst out there.
    Fighting it on your own makes it nearly impossible to beat.
    Try to find someone to confess to.
    There is always someone.
    Getting it out in the open will set you free and on your way to a better life.
    When I confessed and told people that mattered to me it really helped, it was shameful but moving forward it helped.
    GA meetings are excellent.
    You are around people exactly like your self and you feel welcomed and talking about your problems and listening to others really helps.
    One day at a time and things will slowly improve for you.
    Take care and believe in your self.
    Your stronger than you think.
    0 x
    User avatar
    AnnaB (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 363
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 1:15 pm

    Re: Broken

    Sat Jun 17, 2017 3:44 pm

    Hi Annie and everyone who has contributed here... I'm conscious it's the weekend and you mentioned this can be a major trigger - how are you going? I also wanted to say and there are so many posts here that make me think this how courageous folks are - stepping out and connecting here, opening up, expressing the shame, sadness, isolation to name only a few of the challenges people face. This courage leads to recovery, I can seen and read it here.
    0 x
    Annie1741
    Junior Member
    Posts: 12
    Joined: Wed Jun 14, 2017 7:20 am

    Re: Broken

    Mon Apr 29, 2019 9:27 pm

    So I am finally back, at pretty much rock bottom, still with no one to talk to, separated from my husband and soon to be divorced (which is a good thing, he was part of the reason for my addiction) and now have so much debt, secrecy and shame, feel like I've lived a lifetime of anxiety, misery, insanity etc.

    I have no idea how I will survive the next few months of trying to cope with all my debts, so I guess this is it now; rock bottom. Only way is up right?

    Any support would be greatly appreciated.

    Annie x
    1 x
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1676
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: Broken

    Tue Apr 30, 2019 8:50 am

    Hi Annie..sorry about your divorce .but maybe look at it as a new beginning.You said the only way is up so I would work towards that.As bleak as it all might seem now..you can improve your situation.There is a lot of help out there so I would take advantage of that , especially financial help.Once you stop gambling,your life will improve..and it will.
    I was at rock bottom too when I reached out for help..and I have worked hard to get here.
    Be determined and say no to gambling..it won't be easy but the further away you get from gambling,the better you will feel
    Good luck and don't be afraid to reach out for help
    1 x
    Annie1741
    Junior Member
    Posts: 12
    Joined: Wed Jun 14, 2017 7:20 am

    Re: Broken

    Tue Apr 30, 2019 9:24 am

    Hi Pamela,

    Thank you. I sure hope it gets easier, right now it is very overwhelming and hard to be strong. I'm just trying to remind myself that right now I feel like absolute crap - all the emotions - fear, shame, despair etc. and part of me really wants to get away from that. I know all too well that it is a vicious circle and these emotions drive me to repeat the behaviour, even though I feel even worse when I do.

    I don't have a choice anymore because my financial situation is so dire, but it better get easier! It's so long since I've felt good about myself I can't remember how it feels!

    Annie
    1 x

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