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Day 1 of 100 for dad of 3

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2020 3:03 pm
by Octane79
Yesterday my darkest secret was exposed my the Mrs. with 3 CCs maxes out to total 80k, it was what I needed to shake things up. Some harsh words were had to describe my pitiful behaviour ‘more useless than a homeless person’ was justified. I thought I was going be tossed out and lose my wife and 3 beautiful boys (12/10/8).

I have been stuck in this rut for over 5 yrs getting hooked on punting on any sport, horses and most savage greyhounds...

I know it will be hard but my partner is taking full control of finances and working towards settling the debt and cc account closures. I have permanently self excluded myself from numerous online sports betting agencies. I feel I need to air my dirty laundry. My in-laws and my best mate know about it so far ....

Re: Day 1 of 100 for dad of 3

Posted: Wed Sep 16, 2020 11:23 am
by Calvin (facilitator)
Hi there @Octane79
Good on you for reaching out to us all and creating your first post, it takes some courage to take the next step. This is a safe and non-judgemental space to share with us your experiences and your journey towards stopping gambling for good.
Sounds like things have been quite tough, but i'm glad to hear you are taking the necessary steps to help tackle the gambling.
As a starting point you can have a look at joining the 100 day challenge here : https://www.100dc.com.au/
Its a great way to manage progress.
Also have a think about how you can manage those urges to gamble. Are there any activities that can help distract you?

Anyone have any words of support or tips for Octane79?

Re: Day 1 of 100 for dad of 3

Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2020 10:21 am
by Octane79
7 days in and counting. A time where I set some goals and put structures in place to not have lapses. Speaking to a gambling counsellor once a week to pin point why I fell into this dark hole.

No urges, just feel so bad for everyone I have impacted.

Taking it day by day.

Re: Day 1 of 100 for dad of 3

Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2020 12:58 pm
by TimTam
Cheering for you @Octane79 ! :o
What positive steps for you.

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Re: Day 1 of 100 for dad of 3

Posted: Sat Sep 26, 2020 12:47 pm
by Octane79
Day 13

School holidays upon us. No urges. Spending more time with friends, family and my 3 boys.

Keeping it real!

Re: Day 1 of 100 for dad of 3

Posted: Sun Sep 27, 2020 6:03 pm
by JinxyWolf
Hi Octane and Welcome,

Coming clean to family and friends can be the toughest thing you will ever do but it is also the most rewarding. It makes you accountable, it makes you take a deeper look at yourself and your actions and how they impact others. I know for me coming clean to family lifted a weight I had been carrying for 15 long years. It gave me strength to know that I was no longer lying to those I loved.

Like you, the first thing I did was give up access to money, it was tough but you'll find that it is also a relief. You can't just gamble when the urge hits, not having access to quick cash allows you the time to really think about what the consequences of giving into that urge really are. I also found that being proactive in identifying triggers was a huge help for me. That allowed me to put other barriers in place to stop me from giving in. Boredom was a big trigger for me so I concentrated on finding other activities I could do to fill that time when I was bored. Watching movies, playing xbox or starting an art project kept my mind busy so it wasn't thinking about gambling.

Going to councelling and joining this forum is a great start to finally getting this demon off your back.

Know that we are here for you and you are not alone in this fight. No judgement here just support.

JinxyWolf