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  • 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    For those taking the 100 Day Challenge. Share your journey, seek support and track your progress here!
    Springhope17
    Senior Member
    Posts: 235
    Joined: Fri Sep 08, 2017 10:16 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Fri Feb 28, 2020 7:43 pm

    Yes 66 days today!!

    Great work on 2 days GF and making the decision to stop! The first few days.. weeks i found are the hardest! Yes read as many stories as you can om here i found it really helpful and took different strategies from ppl and applied them to my situation which was great! I hope you have a gamble free weekend! Try to ensure u dont have access to cash! No money no gambling!
    You can do this!
    2 x
    Tassie Tiger
    Junior Member
    Posts: 18
    Joined: Wed Feb 26, 2020 11:15 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Tue Mar 03, 2020 8:58 am

    Day 6 Gambling Free!!!
    Don't feel an urge to gamble at the moment but still feel down considering all the money that I lost over the years.
    I hear from friends who just buy their first house or spend money on a new car while I just wasted all this money on online pokies.
    I'm really looking forward to be gambling free and have some savings, spend my money on nice things and
    most of all not to waste all this time in front of a screen. Still considering telling my girlfriend about the addiction but feel to ashamed.
    Although I'm not lying to her as she just doesn't know and it's not a topic, I still feel bad keeping it from her.
    Just would like to say a big Thank You to everyone in the forum and the counsellors as well. Having a place to express the feelings and just writing it down helps me a lot.
    2 x
    Springhope17
    Senior Member
    Posts: 235
    Joined: Fri Sep 08, 2017 10:16 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Tue Mar 03, 2020 9:15 pm

    Grear work on 6 days!

    Today marks 70 GF for me! I am very proud of my efforts so far 30days to my first 100 days GF :D
    6 x
    Calvin (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 508
    Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2018 5:01 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Wed Mar 04, 2020 1:29 pm

    Great work everyone! keep it up :D
    0 x
    Emily01
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2020 6:44 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Fri Mar 06, 2020 6:59 pm

    Well day1 for me. I have come to a point where I physically and emotionally cannot ignore my gambling. Like everyone, rock bottom, but you always wake up the next day that it will happen again unless you are ready to stop. Well today I am. I'm tired of not being able to afford enjoying my life. I have been gambling for probably 20 yrs, and with most people who gamble, I don't own my own house, I think of all the money I have earned over that time and could of brought several.
    I'm discussed with myself
    I have let so many people down
    I have lied
    And I'm so ashamed

    DAY 1
    4 x
    Tassie Tiger
    Junior Member
    Posts: 18
    Joined: Wed Feb 26, 2020 11:15 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Fri Mar 06, 2020 7:26 pm

    Hi,
    Well done on signing up to this forum, Emily01,. It's a great place to start fighting the addiction.
    I believe everyone here has got some or all of the same feelings you're expressing in your post.
    For me the shame is the worst one of all of them. Why on earth would I spend all my money at online pokies. I always thought I'm intelligent, very reasonable on spending and self-controlled but when it comes to the online pokies, all that is gone.

    It's Day 9 for me and this time of the week is the most challenging for me. I lost so much money on Friday afternoons. I can't really tell why but it always feels like I deserve something after a busy working week. Everything is in order, life is good, it's the start of the weekend and then I think ... why not deposit $300 and try my luck. $2000 of losses later and in the middle of the night I feel devastated and can't sleep all weekend. A week or two after that I forget about the losses and do it all over again. Not last Friday though. I was on this Forum reading heaps of the posts and went for a drive to a beach later that day. It was awesome. While seeing the surfers in the ocean I couldn't stop thinking of the "Surf the Urge" analogy. The weekend without that feeling of "I lost everything and need to win it back" was much better.
    Today I've got a pretty strong urge to gamble again but resisted. Kept myself busy with work and went for a long work just before coming here and writing this post. Really happy that this Forum exists. I'm still not ready to tell anyone about my addiction but writing here and using the counsellor chat keeps me happy.
    Keep up the "Hopeless to Happiness" journey everyone ...
    2 x
    Emily01
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Fri Mar 06, 2020 6:44 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Fri Mar 06, 2020 9:53 pm

    Thanks Tassie Tiger, alot of what you said is raining truth for me as well.
    I don't have the courage to tell anyone either, feels good to write it down and have someone to read it and know how your feeling.
    This is going to be my biggest challenge ever, but I know I will win, because I want to.
    Good on you for day 9 :)
    3 x
    Tassie Tiger
    Junior Member
    Posts: 18
    Joined: Wed Feb 26, 2020 11:15 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Mon Mar 09, 2020 7:07 pm

    Day 12 today, yeah!
    Currently no urge to gamble. Just had a bit of an eye opener.
    I read through some of the threads in the "Family and Friends" section of this forum.
    The posts from partners, kids and other family members are very detailed and explain what it does to their relationships.
    I'm feeling terrible to think that MY addiction and MY decisions might destroy the relationships to my girlfriend, friends and family in that way.

    No one nows about my gambling problem yet and I still hesitate to talk about it to anyone because I feel so ashamed.
    I really think about telling my girlfriend and ask her to take control of my finances but I just can't do that to her.
    She's wonderful, the love of my life and I'm sure she would support me. However, she told me about a previous partner with a gambling addiction.
    She even went through a divorce back then and had a very though time.
    We're very happy together but if I tell her I'm afraid she will be taken back to that experience and might even leave me.

    I'd like to propose to her soon but I'm afraid to keep this secret when I ask her to spend the rest of her life with me.
    Not sure if it will come out anyway once we start to look for a common bank account or start looking into financing a house. I'm not completely broke but have got a loan and in general a lot less money in my account to what I should have at my age and salary.
    3 x
    Springhope17
    Senior Member
    Posts: 235
    Joined: Fri Sep 08, 2017 10:16 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Fri Mar 13, 2020 6:51 am

    Hi guys,
    Today marks 80 days!!
    How is everyone else doing?
    3 x
    Tassie Tiger
    Junior Member
    Posts: 18
    Joined: Wed Feb 26, 2020 11:15 pm

    Re: 100 Days.. Yet Again - Hopeless to Happiness

    Fri Mar 13, 2020 8:32 am

    Well done on 80 days gambling free, Springhope17. That's a great achievement.
    Only 20 more days for a huge milestone.

    Day 16 for me today! I'm quite happy about the progress so far.
    Today is the most risky day of all of them. Payday, I'm working from home (not Coronoa Virus though :rolleyes: )and it's Friday.
    I really thought I can just forget about the gambling but I can't. However I've got a few strategies which will hopefully work today.
    One of them is what I'm doing right now. Use this forum to write down my feelings and thoughts as well as reading other people's posts.
    I really need to focus on work for a while, then maybe a bushwalk and later on I'll call a friend to get distracted from the urge to gamble.
    Some of the activities and tools on this website are actually really great. In all honesty I thought the "breathing techniques" and this kind of stuff is a lot of BS.
    However I realised that it really helps to focus on your on breathing and body for a while. It's so true that you can "surf the urge". It does go away after a while.
    One things that really annoys me is that the online casinos don't help you a lot not to gamble. I probably used about 30+ different casinos over the years and self-excluded myself from all of them. They'll still send promotions, texts, calls etc... continuously. I tried all sorts of filters, spam protection etc. but there's still emails and texts coming through.
    Thought about getting a new mobile number and email address but it's just in use with so many other providers that it sounds like a bit of a hassle.
    2 x

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