My 100 Challenge

For those taking the 100 Day Challenge. Share your journey, seek support and track your progress here!

Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Peace&Harmony » Sun Jun 03, 2018 11:25 am

Day 68 GF and going strong.

I have had some urges and feeling of gambling but cannot follow through on them because I have come so far.

All I can think about is the amount of debt that I am in and trying to move towards being debt free. At one stage I was 70k in debt, not all to gambling, but a signficant portion was. Now I am down to around 24k in debt and paying it down slowly.

I am grateful for this season, grateful for being able to see the damage that going in front of those machines.

Can I just say, that I do still have thoughts about gambling, I miss the games, because I liked the games, but the damage has been done in the past. I can see the impact of the lack of impulse control has had in this area and unfortunately it is not something that I can do again.

I have over the past year had a lot of change, change of job, change of city, moved home, bought a home with my partner, anxiety treatment (which has been very good so far) and now taking this out of my life.

I don't post often but I am always watching. And I get loads of encouragement from everyone.
Peace&Harmony
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Jo-Anne » Fri May 25, 2018 10:01 am

Awesome effort Peace&Harmony.....the urges and triggers can be overcome,...call on help if needed. I wouldn't hesitate to call the Helpline now if the urges were overwhelming as like you I do not want to go back there. Suffering from depression and anxiety myself, gambling only makes it worse!.......Have a great weekend.......Sincerely Jo
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby pamela » Fri May 25, 2018 7:44 am

Well done on getting to day 59..every day gamble free is a giant win..keep up the good work and keep saying no
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Mona58 » Thu May 24, 2018 11:19 pm

Well done on 59 days P&H !

Keep going strong!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Peace&Harmony » Thu May 24, 2018 10:40 pm

Day 59 on the road to recovery and it has not been easy but boy oh boy as you go further along you can get more perspective of things!

It has been a rough old time though with urges continuing and the constant feeling of wanting to gamble, that does get tiring. I suffer anxiety also and that is a trigger for me to numb and detatch from reality, through gambling. I have seen that for what it is, and I am so grateful that even though, I have probably spent so much money over the past 8 years or so, I can see the reason for why I gamble and how it relates to the anxiety and how the anxiety relates to the gambling,

So I may have two mean old demons to contend with however, I can see it for what it is, one day at time is all I am required to deal with and I think that through all the pain and feelings of flight, fight or freeze, I have not run those gambling machines.

I am excited to be halfway through this mini journey, but really it is day 59 on the road of forever.

Does it mean that I am going to be close to tempting, or not relapse, NO! That is always a possibility and a reality of the healing process, but again one day at a time.

I must say that my thoughts are not governed by the evil machines as much as before. That is welcome. I am enjoying life more.

Being in Melbourne again, does bring a lot of triggers my way, but I am being kind to myself and taking it one day at a time.
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Mona58 » Fri May 11, 2018 6:19 pm

Well done P&H .

I like the " new found free time" ... l love to lay on the couch,, close my eyes and have this enormous sense of blankness. No worries,, no problems... enters the equation. Makes me feel that I am in control of my life.

Keep going strong !
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Peace&Harmony » Fri May 11, 2018 2:10 pm

Thanks for responding Calvin,

Been GF now 46 days and still on track.

Working through the urges still, the nausea that appears, the hypertension and anxiety, but it is a lot less intense and feeling more in control.

The weekends are not so fearful anymore and I don't feel so overwhelmed with all my new found free time.

Gardening this weekend and a few social dates and chores will keep me busy for another weekend.

Good luck all.

P&H
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Calvin (facilitator) » Thu May 10, 2018 5:38 pm

Peace&Harmony wrote:Thanks Mona,

Sitting on 39 days GF and going really well.

Still have the odd urge but again the wave heights and intensity are starting to calm down now and I am feeling much more in control and that feeling of quitting has sunk in - and I do not miss the waste of time and energy that I was doing, even if on an infrequent basis, anymore.

It is amazing how we can rewire the brain by sticking to a decision. The mind is stronger and you can build self control.

I am continuing to work on it and walk towards the horizon rather than getting caught up on what has happened.

And I feel like I can look back on that part of my life as an investment, and investment in a better me, rather than just going back for more and more and feeling I have to do it, I don't have to do anything, I do have self control and I can quit and I did. 40 days ago.

Anyhow continuing onwards and upwards.



Hi Peace&Harmony,
I'm one of the moderators here on gambling help online.

That is a tremendous effort! Well done to you !
Its good that you are aware of the times where those waves of urges may creep up to you, but it sounds like you have gained that skill and ability to control these urges and not give in to the temptation. Keep up the good work.

regards,

Calvin
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Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Peace&Harmony » Fri May 04, 2018 2:48 pm

Thanks Mona,

Sitting on 39 days GF and going really well.

Still have the odd urge but again the wave heights and intensity are starting to calm down now and I am feeling much more in control and that feeling of quitting has sunk in - and I do not miss the waste of time and energy that I was doing, even if on an infrequent basis, anymore.

It is amazing how we can rewire the brain by sticking to a decision. The mind is stronger and you can build self control.

I am continuing to work on it and walk towards the horizon rather than getting caught up on what has happened.

And I feel like I can look back on that part of my life as an investment, and investment in a better me, rather than just going back for more and more and feeling I have to do it, I don't have to do anything, I do have self control and I can quit and I did. 40 days ago.

Anyhow continuing onwards and upwards.
Peace&Harmony
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Posts: 24
Joined: Wed Mar 28, 2018 10:20 pm

Re: My 100 Challenge

Postby Mona58 » Wed Apr 25, 2018 9:15 pm

Well done on 30 days GF!

Keep going strong...
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
Mona58
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