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Friend asked for help where do I start?

Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2020 4:25 am
by Ct9319
Hi all,
Just recently a good friend opened up about his gambling issue, I always knew there was a problem but I couldn't say anything as he always denied it.
To keep this short and simple, he asked me if he could send all his my money to my account, and have me managed a weekly allowance. My only concern is I would need a separate account so he can't claim that I'm spending his money etc etc. And also I'm worried about the ato seeing the initial transfer and future transactions to my name as a undeclared income.

Am I over thinking the situation :confused:

Re: Friend asked for help where do I start?

Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2020 9:53 am
by AGHS
Hi, giving someone else control over money when you have a gambling issue is one of the strategies that are used. I understand your concerns regarding the transfer of his funds in your account and you are correct that if it accrues interest, you will need to declare this with the ato. Alternatives are: accompany your friend to his bank and have a chat regarding how his bank can restrict money being used for gambling or get your friend to give you all of his cards, internet banking access (you change the password), set up automatic deductions for payments and provide him with a no cash card (gift card even) for general daily purchases. It is important that your friend seeks some professional help for his gambling. Just restricting access to money does not address the underlying issues which led him to gamble. You can even accompany him for support if needed. He could consider barring himself from venues and online gambling sites. You can get betfilter www.betfilter.com on phones which blocks access to all sites. Venue barring is easy, he just needs to select all venues within say a 200km radius and request that he is barred simply by going to one venue and they will do it for him. You're friend really needs to you to support him through this process, focus on his achievements, if he relapses, it's OK, this is NORMAL when someone is going up the road of recovery. Also, use this forum, we have all been on this journey and are here to help.

Re: Friend asked for help where do I start?

Posted: Mon Jul 06, 2020 1:34 pm
by gzy3
Hi @Ct9319 , welcome to this forum!

Your friend is very fortunate to have you trying to supporting him. I understand your concern.

As @AGHS mentioned, the major banks have some services to block gambling related transactions.
They may be able to provide some other options to better control his spending.
Visit this website: https://gamblershelp.com.au/support-dur ... bit-cards/

Does anyone else have a thought on how Ct9319 can deal with the situation?

Re: Friend asked for help where do I start?

Posted: Thu Nov 19, 2020 3:11 am
by GANIA
On behalf of every addict on the planet - Thank You!! 🥰 People like you, who still have an open heart and a kind word and offer tangible support are incredibly rare.
Not many people can be bothered to help someone in need if it takes more than a few bucks.

But I've gotta say, there are other ways to support your mate. It's incredibly brave of you to even consider this option & your mate's super lucky to have u in their corner. Just be prepared to duck the odd punch. Controlling someone's funds is a MASSIVE responsibility when that someone is an addict. I know coz I'm an addict (alcoholic in recovery) & I know how much hate I've sent out to anyone that got in the way when I needed a fix. Believe me, there's nothing unique about me. An addict will almost always choose their fix over you. Having said that, I truly wish your friend strength and more strength.
Do you see that sign?
Just #keepwalking ✌🕉 #yougotthis 💪🤩