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  • My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

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    Miki1
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Mon Oct 14, 2013 2:29 am

    My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

    Mon Oct 14, 2013 2:34 am

    Hi. New to the forum. Wanted to share my story.I grew up in the 90's with 3 siblings and my parents. I'm 27 now. My father had a serious gambling problem, he would gamble away all our money on slot machines. My mother was a housewife so this was our only income. At many times we couldn't pay rent or heat in the house. Both of my parents have had tough childhoods and lived in foster families. I think this affected the way they acted towards us kids. My father was always very unemotional and distant. My mother had little emotional control and told me and my older sister things children are to young to hear. My 2 other siblings are way younger than us so they were often left out of this. My mother also confided in my older sister and told her all about our financial situation and how we shouldn't trust our father. My mother also told me this to some extent, but my older sister took most of it.I've always been very angry with my father and always encouraged my mum to get divorced. I was very rude to my dad and fought with him a lot. He also hit me (never my siblings) several times when I grew up, which is illegal in Sweden where I grew up. I was a very angry child generally. Growing up I was very insecure and couldn't confirm my self worth. I think the most frustrating part was not being able to be in control - I really depended on my parents but they let me down by not providing a home I felt safe in. I wasn't sure if the bills were going to be paid, when my dad was going to be home and if I would get in a fight with him when he asked to borrow money from me, my sister or my mother. I also remember one time very clearly when I was about 17 and had started working to have my own money. I gave my mother money for her to pay a bill for me as I didn't have a card myself and later I got a letter from the company saying that my payment was overdue. It turned out that my mother had given my father the money I gave her. These kind of things were pretty common and hurt. She sided with him when I clearly sided with her and I had a hard time understanding why and felt betrayed. I understand her now better, but I can get frustrated when I think about it. But I don't feel angry, not towards my father or my mother - just sad. I'm also more secure now than ever. But I have a hard time receiving certain feelings and interacting with my parents. <br style="color: rgb(34, 34, 34); font-family: arial, sans-serif; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255
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    POPEYE
    Senior Member
    Posts: 664
    Joined: Mon Mar 11, 2013 11:28 pm

    RE: My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

    Mon Oct 14, 2013 6:24 pm

    .
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    Miki1
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Mon Oct 14, 2013 2:29 am

    RE: My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

    Tue Oct 15, 2013 2:15 am

    Hi! Thank you so much for your kind words. It meant a lot for me to read them. I very rarely talk about how my childhood has been, not even to my husband or close friends. So it feels good to get a reminder that I am my own person and can develop differently from my parents.
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    Angelina.
    Senior Member
    Posts: 326
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 12:43 pm

    RE: My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

    Tue Oct 15, 2013 11:56 pm

    Dear Miki,

    Welcome to the gambling help online forums, it is wonderful to see you here. In support of Popeye's post we thank you for sharing your story and for writing with such integrity. Yes, it is certainly helpful to hear the position from the 'other side of the fence' as it maintains perspective in our unique journeys.

    I won't say too much to avoid clogging up traffic, but I felt very connected with what you shared in your post.

    Take care,
    Warm regards,

    Angelina
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    Anabelle
    Junior Member
    Posts: 1
    Joined: Fri Oct 25, 2013 5:56 pm

    RE: My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

    Fri Oct 25, 2013 5:57 pm

    A large number of states have passed laws recently permitting a greater amount of legal gambling, or rather permitting more casinos, bingo halls and slots in several areas. It does bring in more tax revenue and gambling, like any other activity, is harmless when done for fun and in moderation. However, the darker side is people locked in a gambling addiction, which takes a heavy toll on both victims and the nation as a whole.
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    Angelina.
    Senior Member
    Posts: 326
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 12:43 pm

    RE: My father had a gambling problem all my childhood.

    Sat Oct 26, 2013 1:29 am

    Hi Anabelle,

    Great to see another new member! Welcome . What brings you here? We are curious to hear your story.


    Warm regards,
    Angelina
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