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  • My Sister has a huge problem

    Is someone you care about experiencing issues with gambling? Come in here to discuss your concerns, connect, and get some helpful tips.
    jen2019
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:58 am

    My Sister has a huge problem

    Fri Aug 09, 2019 7:15 am

    Hi l am so happy l have found this forum . My sister and her partner have both been gambling for over a decade the problem is so bad that they are in the process of losing their house.
    7 years ago my sister actually stole a lot of money from my other sisters business this went on over a 5 month period and was close to 40k . The funny thing is it was spoken about and my sister and her partner got a loan to pay it back and they swore they would never gamble again.

    Unfortunately why family have believed it its not the case over the years on a regular bases my sister rings me begging for money and has to be deposited into her account instantly she has also begged my partner often to , granted the money is always paid back but usually weeks later and they avoid us when they owe money most times.

    The lies are anything from l need it now because l cant get home no fuel , or car broke down need money for car parking they wont let me get the car out to medical emergencies to no food . Recently after she begged for money calling my home and mobile and partners mobile 14 times in 3 minutes until l answered and again needed money instantly with the promise that she would pay it the next day. Something happened to me the last time she called wanting cash l was angry at her yelled and told her l was sick of this s##t and she had to pay it the following day , of course she didn't and of course she ignored all calls l made to her so l told my mum (who just made excuses for her which is normal) 15 minutes after l told my mum l suddenly get text after text with the most vile things said to me she was enraged because l told mum l mean vicious things so much so l blocked her after telling her to stick some more money in the pokies money that is not yours. l lost it l am at the point where l love but hate my sister her attempt to cover up her secrets and lies after lies has agitated me and yet l still feel guilty and manipulated by her l have chosen to keep her number blocked because l cant deal with it anymore and l do not know what to do . l wish my family would belief me and stop giving her money but they don't l feel alone and this is never spoken about any advise would be appreciated.
    0 x
    gzy3
    Senior Member
    Posts: 106
    Joined: Thu May 09, 2019 3:39 pm

    Re: My Sister has a huge problem

    Fri Aug 09, 2019 1:16 pm

    Hello @jen2019 and welcome to the forum.

    I can hear things has been very difficult and you have been going through a lot of different feelings - disappointment, betrayal, guilt, feeling lost, frustration.
    It is not uncommon to feel distressed and lost with what to do to for family members's problem gambling.
    What support do you have for yourself? I wonder if calling the Gambling Helpline on 1800 858 858 might be helpful for you to unpack this matter and explore your options with a trained professional?

    Does anyone have any advice for jen2019 from their own experiences?

    Kind Regards,
    gzy3
    2 x
    jen2019
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:58 am

    Re: My Sister has a huge problem

    Fri Aug 09, 2019 1:42 pm

    Thank you gzy3 you are very right l am very frustrated at the moment l have tried the gentle approach for years l just feel like l am being constantly manipulated and lie to as someone that can give her money and she tells any and every lie to get it.

    l even made appointments for counselling for her which she never attended

    l am just lost and have given up the fact she does not want help , and now l need to get it through to family to stop giving her cash.

    l did ring the Gambling Hotline and l will be given an appointment to talk to a counsellor l want my sister back to me she has lost Empathy and everything is all about money. Thank you so much
    2 x
    gzy3
    Senior Member
    Posts: 106
    Joined: Thu May 09, 2019 3:39 pm

    Re: My Sister has a huge problem

    Fri Aug 09, 2019 4:18 pm

    Hi @jen2019 Great that you have already contacted Gambler's Helpline and will see a counsellor for yourself.
    You are caring and trying to be very supportive of your sister - I know it has been disappointing she has not taken your kind arrangement.
    I hope you will be provided good support and advice on how to communicate with her and your family and how to set up boundaries, so she won't continue to be enabled to gamble.
    You are not alone. Take care.
    1 x

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