Welcome to our online peer support community - A supportive place for anyone making change in their gambling, as well as concerned friends and family.
  • Connect, be inspired, motivate others. Share your experience & strategies.
  • Safe. Anonymous. Professionally moderated. Free of judgement.

    Before you can post or reply, join our online community today.
    Join us Tuesdays from 6pm for Chatty Tuesday.
  • My father is addicted to gambling

    Is someone you care about experiencing issues with gambling? Come in here to discuss your concerns, connect, and get some helpful tips.
    Hi_1234
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Tue Jan 17, 2017 11:29 pm

    My father is addicted to gambling

    Tue Jan 17, 2017 11:45 pm

    Hi,

    I'm not really sure what to do as I've never had to do anything like this before.

    I think my dad is addicted to gambling... I don't live at home anymore but since I have moved out (a few years ago) my mum has told me that it has gotten worse. He goes through 'phases' and gets really bad every few months, but then won't gamble for a few months. This time he is calling in sick at work to gamble, taking out loans and my mum is really feeling the pressure financially causing her to drink (alchol) more than normal. I've tried talking to him about it but he has a lot of pride, so it's very hard to get him to admit he has an addiction. I have a sister and a brother and they both still live at home, they have said that it has been causing a lot of arguments between our parents and we are very worried that this may cause them to split and that my mum is also now gaining an alcohol addiction . Any advice would help please.
    0 x
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1716
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: My father is addicted to gambling

    Wed Jan 18, 2017 9:38 am

    Wow you are in a tough place.unfortunately most gambling addicts wont admit they have a problem..I would try talking to both of them together and try offering to get some help for them...explain the effect they are having on your family..I wish you and your family all the best
    0 x
    blastoise (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 222
    Joined: Thu Nov 26, 2015 4:49 pm

    Re: My father is addicted to gambling

    Wed Jan 18, 2017 5:25 pm

    Hello Hi_123,

    Welcome to the forum! Thanks for taking the time to share your experience about your dads gambling. I guess one of the first questions that comes to mind is that you mentioned it happens every few months...maybe ask your mum to reflect on what is happening at these times she notices he gambles, ie stress, arguments/conflict etc.
    Another question to consider is, do you think your dad sees the gambling as a problem? Often it is hard to help others who can't see the impact of the gambling, or have the motivation to change.

    I encourage you to call Gamblers Help 1800 858 858, an speak to a Gambling Counsellor. I would also suggest calling Directline 1800 888 236 and asking for advice about your mums drinking. You can also inbox me and I can explore this a bit more with you, but the support is here if you need it.

    Hope that helps, please don't hesitate to ask for advice, there's some amazing people who have gone through similar experiences that you and your family are going through on here.

    Blastoise
    0 x
    Hi_1234
    Junior Member
    Posts: 2
    Joined: Tue Jan 17, 2017 11:29 pm

    Re: My father is addicted to gambling

    Wed Jan 18, 2017 7:27 pm

    Thanks so much for your advice guys.

    I am feeling a lot of pressure about this as I feel like I am the most 'responsible' child in our family, and my siblings seem to not take as much notice as I do... unless I am the one to bring up the conversation about it, and then they seem to brush I off. I don't want to leave this whole situation to get any worse. Your advice has already made me feel a lot better. Thank you.
    0 x
    Bada
    Junior Member
    Posts: 8
    Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2016 3:12 pm

    Re: My father is addicted to gambling

    Fri Jan 20, 2017 10:11 am

    Hi there 1234,

    I think you have been very sensible, and courageous, to take the first step in seeing a problem and reaching out for help for you, your family and your Dad.

    Remember, that you are not to blame, or responsible for your Dad's gambling problem. But, equipped with knowledge, support and taking the right action you can most definitely contribute to making a difference for yourself and the people around you. I am sorry that you have had to face this challenge, but well done, and don't feel alone. Us with partners of gamblers can often see the solutions so easily and clearly picture how much better our lives will be without the impact of the gambler, but the person gambling is viewing things in a different world for now.

    It is interesting to hear your comments about your siblings brushing it off. I suspect that could be a self-survival approach from them while they are trying to understand why their Dad is gambling, why life is tough under the roof at home, and now Mum is turning to alcohol to help cope. You have a great gift living outside of the house, in that you can probably see things more clearly and from a different perspective, and great to see you are using that advantage by seeking help. I am sure your siblings know what is happening and are hurting too. The best thing you can do is encourage them to seek help as you are (maybe speak with a counselor, or talk in depth about what you have seen, and have them share their perspective) as well as educate them on your Dad's addiction. I have no doubt that if you all commit to wanting to help your Dad, point him to help and take firm steps in setting boundaries at home and not enabling his addiction will help. Ensure your Mum sees hope and support too.
    In all likelihood, your step towards seeking help for your family will likely help everyone and lead to a happier, closer home and family life for everyone.
    Bada
    0 x

    Return to “For Family and Friends”