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  • What i think these days.

    For people making and maintaining change in their gambling. Connect, ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!
    User avatar
    doug
    Senior Member
    Posts: 362
    Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:51 pm

    What i think these days.

    Sat Mar 23, 2013 9:58 pm

    HI

    The mind plays all kinds of tricks on us.

    First it beat me up when i gambled.

    Second it feels better when i havent gambled for almost 9 weeks.

    Third, my mind is a little fearfull that i will slip up , i think im am actually more nervous about slipping up then the gambling itself at the 9 week point. I'm dealing with some stress at the moment, my life in general is ok. But my mind keeps replaying a silly idea.

    The idea its tellng me is that i need to slip up once, so that i can move on. To get the slip up monkey off my back .

    I'm trying to brainstorm some ideas to keep that idea out of my head.

    hang in there everyone,, keep whatever monkey you have off your back if possible.
    0 x
    Doug who's the good dog?
    User avatar
    POPEYE
    Senior Member
    Posts: 664
    Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2013 12:28 am

    RE: What i think these days.

    Sat Mar 23, 2013 10:35 pm

    .
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    Peter
    Junior Member
    Posts: 18
    Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 4:44 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Sun Mar 24, 2013 8:56 am

    Hi Doug,

    9 weeks - wow - that's great.

    I agree - The mind does play funny tricks. At the moment it sounds like it's trying to tempt you back.

    I'm only 1 week, so don't have the experience of having given up for a while and slipping back, but for me I thin what Popeye says would ring true. Any time I've had a gap of not playing, I've always gone and spent more.

    In my mind, I've always loved gambling. It's like it's in the blood. I did it because I actually really enjoyed it. So I know I can't slip.

    But now, it's the end result I'm really starting to hate. I really hate not having any money for the last week of my pay cycle. I hate having to juggle a trickle of money so I can tell my wife which 'account' she can pay the groceries from. I hate thinking that if anything should happen and I need money to deal with it, that I don't have any left.

    So I'm trying to play a trick on my mind. I normally disassociate gambling from not having money - i.e. I gamble and I love it and I don't think of the consequences, then a few days later I realise I'm broke and 'how did I get here'? Now when I'm broke and anxious about that, I'm picturing myself actually gambling, and really hating the fact that this is causing my current anxiousness about not having money. I'm trying to trick my mind that I really hate gambling. I think I have concluded that I really hate having no money more than I love gambling.

    It's one idea to consider for your brainstorming - not sure how it will go, but I did get access to some 'spare' cash yesterday, so have had two days of opportunities to gamble it away - and happily it still sits in my pocket. But it's been really hard and messing with my head, and I know it's getting past day 40, 60 and 100 and not slipping that I've got to get through.

    Hang in there Doug - you're doing great!

    Peter
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    AnnaB (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 363
    Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 2:15 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Sun Mar 24, 2013 10:23 pm

    doug (23/03/2013)HI

    The mind plays all kinds of tricks on us.

    First it beat me up when i gambled.

    Second it feels better when i havent gambled for almost 9 weeks.

    Third, my mind is a little fearfull that i will slip up , i think im am actually more nervous about slipping up then the gambling itself at the 9 week point. I'm dealing with some stress at the moment, my life in general is ok. But my mind keeps replaying a silly idea.

    The idea its tellng me is that i need to slip up once, so that i can move on. To get the slip up monkey off my back .

    I'm trying to brainstorm some ideas to keep that idea out of my head.

    hang in there everyone,, keep whatever monkey you have off your back if possible.
    Hi guysIt's great to read how well you are all going, despite the struggle of fighting that monkey on your back! I wanted to offer a twist on things to see what you all thought?... But before I do, I did want to say that I think challenging the thoughts, the way Peter described is a great strategy. There are some useful resources online that can provide some additional tips on how to do this if keen to know more. A couple of sites are: http://www.getselfhelp.co.ukhttp://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/consumers.cfmThe sites target all sorts of issues but if you have a look around they both have sections on how to manage worry and other states like low self-esteem. I am conscious that sometimes battling the thoughts can be exhausting. So here's my twist...I've attached a video link that has an ex monk talking about how to manage a busy mind and give it a break, even if it's just for 10 minutes. I appreciate, easier said than done sometimes! Jhttp://www.ted.com/talks/andy_puddicomb ... nutes.html <font face=C
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    ansert
    Member
    Posts: 76
    Joined: Thu Mar 21, 2013 10:53 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Sun Mar 24, 2013 10:36 pm

    Ahhh getting peace from the busy mind, a lifelong challenge that I am yet to beat, I can't do anything half arsed and it's a problem alright!
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    Noah (facilitator)
    Senior Member
    Posts: 308
    Joined: Mon Nov 05, 2012 3:53 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Tue Mar 26, 2013 12:37 pm

    It's definitely a real challenge to calm a busy mind! When you said Ansert, that...you can't do anything half arsed...it made me think about the impact that competitiveness or perfectionism has on a gambling...be keen to hear your thoughts?
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    ansert
    Member
    Posts: 76
    Joined: Thu Mar 21, 2013 10:53 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Tue Mar 26, 2013 11:09 pm

    OMG Noah, for me it is everything!!! How dare this stupid machine beat me?? When I am so smart hahaha

    I am the eternal optimist which doesn't help as I always think I will win eventually - but mainly it's about beating the machine, ''man against the machine'' I believe they call it and being a perfectionist who can't and won't give up until I win!
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    POPEYE
    Senior Member
    Posts: 664
    Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2013 12:28 am

    RE: What i think these days.

    Tue Mar 26, 2013 11:51 pm

    .
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    BriM
    Senior Member
    Posts: 384
    Joined: Wed Dec 05, 2012 3:05 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Wed Mar 27, 2013 10:18 am

    Oh my gosh yes, so interesting! I've often been really annoyed at myself if I can't seem to give something up, or stick to my decisions. I'm a massive perfectionist. Maybe it's a matter of trying to turn your thoughts around, as Popeye suggested, and redefine winning?!
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    doug
    Senior Member
    Posts: 362
    Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 7:51 pm

    RE: What i think these days.

    Wed Mar 27, 2013 6:57 pm

    thanks everyone.

    love your comments.

    im still hanging in there.

    had a dream about gambling last night..but the monkey stayed away today.

    bad monkey
    0 x
    Doug who's the good dog?

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