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  • 100 days challenge number two

    This forum is designed for you to chart your progress in working to overcome your gambling concerns and your oning recovery. Take us all on your road to recovery!
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1610
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Mon Feb 01, 2016 7:13 am

    SW..you have got a lot to work through but you have to really want to stop for it to happen..do you want this miserable cycle to continue?
    You are obviously a smart person so you have to take control and just say enough is enough...gambling is soul destroying but once you stop everything improves..dont give up trying ..its hard work but well worth the effort..put your money where you cant access it and maybe try self exclusion..try any thing that will help break the cycle and help you to feel normal again
    0 x
    SW1
    Senior Member
    Posts: 157
    Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2014 6:43 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Mon Feb 01, 2016 6:56 pm

    Gday Pamela,

    No I don't want this cycle to continue .
    I need to do whatever is possible to break it! Its killing me
    0 x
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1610
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Mon Feb 01, 2016 9:05 pm

    Then stay strong and say no to gambling every morning you wake up..it can be done ..and you know you want to so as tough as it is you have to keep saying no and soon enough you wont even be thinking of them..dont give up
    0 x
    SW1
    Senior Member
    Posts: 157
    Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2014 6:43 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Tue Feb 02, 2016 7:19 pm

    Gday Pamela, I will not give up on giving up, I am at that point with this cycle where I don't have any money.
    So the desire to gamble isn't there.
    Its waiting for next Thursday when I get paid. And the voices inside my head will tell me I should gamble, I will win the money I need. The money I have isn't enough.
    That's the terrible nature of this disease, I can see the urges to gamble coming. After years of it, I know they will be there. Just as strong as ever.
    All the thoughts I've had of not gambling, and knowing how awful it is will go.
    Day 4 again, I've had so many day 4s in the last six months
    0 x
    Dave68
    Senior Member
    Posts: 320
    Joined: Sun Jan 26, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Tue Feb 02, 2016 8:21 pm

    Hi SW1. I reckon you have to really get angry at the gambling demon. I did that early in my phase of giving up, i'd constantly remind myself when i delivered to the two venues exactly what i had lost over the years, what it's led to me being in debt by, and the time that losing that money has condemned me to work in order to pay back the debts. Maybe as you drive past....even if you yell and curse from inside your car (window up of course) just release an anger towards the machines, the venues. That may get your brain thinking differently when the inevitable time comes when payday arrives and your wallet full of money almost cajoles your gambling demon in your head to go in and play the machines. If you can break the hold that demon has on you, and by associating venues with anger and disappointment and unfulfillment, it may work.

    You've been on this path many times, and you already know the drill insofar as how destructive gambling can be, but you owe it to yourself to defeat the demon. Castigate him, tell yourself what that demon is costing you with stress, being broke, not having the money to do what you need, and also that it's affecting your work. Keep being angry at the gambling demon, and he can be defeated. He's very persistent, and for me the association with money and pokies was a nexus i failed to break for 16 years. But i did break the nexus, and no i can play the pokies on the FB apps, at no cost. It replicates the excitement i used to get (and even replicates the frustrations of a near miss or a bad feature) but i can play them for totally free, and i am satisfied with that. I know that gambling in the late 90's and start of the 2000's was probably my life's highlight, and i now know it's something i can never do with money, because i proved over that 16 years of pokie play that i am no good at them.

    I remain no good at them on the app, but now, my only cost is free tokens. It helps me, and i also have no desires to put a coin in a real machine. It could help if you're alone at home, but you have to destroy the association money has with the machines first. That's where getting angry might also work. Get angry, stay angry and don't let them have the right to take your money, and your happiness. The venues, they are agents of the government who rely on our gambling taxes, and the pokie barons. Not us, we're the lowest on the totem pole. Denying them our money is the best answer we can give to them.
    0 x
    SW1
    Senior Member
    Posts: 157
    Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2014 6:43 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Wed Feb 03, 2016 5:48 am

    Thank you Dave, so true! I need to stay angry at the machines, the venues, the demon. We are the lowest denominator on this ladder of gambling.
    I need to scream at those things as you said. Remind myself of how much anger and frustration I had after I walked out of the casino last Friday night after blowing all my money. And the hundreds of times before that has happened.
    The times alone make up probably two thirds of my life, I need to fill them more positively.

    Thank you everyone for your support, I need to do this.
    0 x
    SW1
    Senior Member
    Posts: 157
    Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2014 6:43 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Fri Feb 05, 2016 5:48 am

    Day 7 today, no money so no urges to gamble, I have restricted my access to cash next Thursday (pay day) that will be a tough day though, having cash again will definitely bring on the urges.
    0 x
    SW1
    Senior Member
    Posts: 157
    Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2014 6:43 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Sat Feb 06, 2016 6:49 am

    Day 8 today.
    I hope everyone is having a good weekend and staying gamble free.
    0 x
    pamela
    Senior Member
    Posts: 1610
    Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Sat Feb 06, 2016 6:21 pm

    No gambling for me today...
    0 x
    SW1
    Senior Member
    Posts: 157
    Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2014 6:43 pm

    Re: 100 days challenge number two

    Sun Feb 07, 2016 1:31 pm

    Brilliant Pamela, everyday without gambling is the biggest win we can have. You have done so well, and are such a great encouragement to myself and others on these forums, thank you so much. I appreciate it a lot!!
    I won't gamble today
    0 x

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