" "

Where to start ?

Discuss and ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!

Where to start ?

Postby User 5adbc6d6e0396 » Sun Apr 22, 2018 9:45 am

Hi

I have been gambling for many many years and I am currently at my worst, I used to be able to control my spending somewhat, but over the last few months it has gotten out of control. I am at a point where I spend what I know I can spend on the pokies, then I think oh I will use the money I have set aside for food and smokes to try to win it back, then when that fails I use my loan repayment money, then my rent money, then I get pay day loans to cover my costs.

This week I gambled my entire pay, as well as the rent money my partner and transfered me. I missed the payments on 4 of my 6 payday loans, payments for my credit cards and personal loan, and left myself without money for anything.

To top it off I was meant to be going on a holiday this week, which I now can not, and had to admit to my partner and friends why I couldn't. I feel terrible.

I have taken the step of actually speaking with my sister who has been surprisingly understanding and encouraging.

I feel so lost and don't know what to do, and what steps to take, I have thought about self excluding from venues I go to, the process is daunting and I feel embarrassed about going to the places to do this, as I have come to know the people there, can anyone shed some light on how they went about doing it, do you just go up to the counter and say "I need to talk to someone about self excluding myself from this place" ?

I want to be able to do things like go out for dinner or go on holidays or simply go to the supermarket and buy something for dinner without thinking can I afford it. I need help and am overwhelmed by what to do. Any advice would be appreciated.
User 5adbc6d6e0396
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 9:18 am

Re: Where to start ?

Postby Jo-Anne » Sun Apr 22, 2018 11:37 am

Hi......so sorry to read your post and it is understandable that you are feeling very low. It is great that you are reaching out for help. The gambling help line 1800858858 is a good first option to find assistance with maybe some counselling. The gambling and financial counsellors are very good I have found. I'm sure other forum members will be able to offer suggestions about self exclusion from venues (I am in WA so unsure of the procedure) I know it seems embarrasing when you are known....however I felt so free once I self excluded from the casino in Perth......It becomes your protection in these early days when the urges are stronger.

For the first few days, take it easy and look after yourself. You will become stronger and will be able to put some plans in place.

Sincerely
Jo
Jo-Anne
Senior Member
 
Posts: 457
Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2016 10:40 pm

Re: Where to start ?

Postby User 5adbc6d6e0396 » Tue Apr 24, 2018 9:33 am

Update since my last post.

I have spoken with the gambling help line and the financial counciling hotline, which has made me an appointment with a gambling/financial councillor, I have also made contact with the co ordinator for gamblers annonomous meetings and self excluded myself from 2 of my favourite most convenient venues. The staff at the venues both wished me luck and were encouraging I have for the first time done a budget, in which it really paints a picture of my true situation and this in itself is motivation to keep me going.

I feel optimistic moving forward, self exclusion is an easy process, I think in the future should I think I'll go somewhere different to gamble I should be able to go there to self exclude, I am going to do this, I can do this.

Dan
User 5adbc6d6e0396
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 9:18 am

Re: Where to start ?

Postby Jo-Anne » Tue Apr 24, 2018 10:09 am

Hi Dan......so happy for you.....so much progress in a few days.....well done!! You are on the best path....stay strong Jo ☺☺
Jo-Anne
Senior Member
 
Posts: 457
Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2016 10:40 pm

Re: Where to start ?

Postby How the F did I get here » Wed Apr 25, 2018 11:01 pm

Keep it up Dan! Sounds like things are moving in a positive direction for you.
I had a completely different experience with trying to self exclude from the venue I gambled 99% of the time.

So nice to hear they were supportive and happy to wish you well.
How the F did I get here
Member
 
Posts: 91
Joined: Sun Apr 08, 2018 11:05 pm

Re: Where to start ?

Postby User 5adbc6d6e0396 » Sun Apr 29, 2018 10:27 am

Thank you all for you encouraging replies, I've now been 10 days without gambling, admittedly because I have had no access to money, it still feels like an achievement though.

Keeping busy with house work and the family has really helped me this week.

Tuesday night when my pay goes into the bank is going to be a struggle for me, I have put in place some measures so I don't gamble thou, but the thought of getting paid is stressing me out as I want to continue with being gambling free.

I went to my first gamblers anonymous meeting during the week, and did find it helpful, everyone was was kind and it was not at all as bad as I thought it would be.

Dan
User 5adbc6d6e0396
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 9:18 am

Re: Where to start ?

Postby Pea pod » Sun Apr 29, 2018 5:49 pm

Hi "where to start" I can understand how you feel. I'm am totally triggered by pay going in. This week I am determined to change my banking system to road block my addiction. I need to have no acres for a few months so I'm going to set that up. After relapsing last week I gambled again today and have hit rock bottom. We as addicts needs to stop easy access to money. All the best.
Pea pod
Senior Member
 
Posts: 160
Joined: Thu Jun 22, 2017 12:23 pm

Re: Where to start ?

Postby User 5adbc6d6e0396 » Thu May 03, 2018 7:16 pm

Day 14 !!!

2 whole weeks up for me now, it has really helped not having access to money, I have paid all my bills that I had budgeted for this week, done a full grocery shop for the whole fortnight and it feels really good knowing I don't have to worry about missed bills or worrying about what to have for dinner.

I have thought about gambling but have not had the means to do so, my sister having complete access to my bank and and having to provide receipts for money spent is really making me accountable for not going to play the pokies.

Even though I'm still having strong urges to do so I am still optimistic that one day they will fade.

I think I may have read this on here somewhere, but every time I think of playing the pokies I remind myself that "I'm winning by not playing" which I certainly am winning by not playing :o

Dan
User 5adbc6d6e0396
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 9:18 am

Re: Where to start ?

Postby Mona58 » Thu May 03, 2018 7:33 pm

Well done Dan! Keep fighting! stay strong.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
Mona58
Senior Member
 
Posts: 807
Joined: Sun Oct 15, 2017 11:44 am

Re: Where to start ?

Postby User 5adbc6d6e0396 » Thu May 03, 2018 7:57 pm

Thanks mona ! I have read most of your posts and you bring a real community feel to this site, I must admit I feel inspired by you, and enjoy reading your comments :)
User 5adbc6d6e0396
Junior Member
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2018 9:18 am

Next

Return to The Courtyard

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests