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My story - looking for advice

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My story - looking for advice

Postby Oregon » Thu Nov 30, 2017 2:25 pm

Hi all,

New to this today and just reading some of the stories has helped me already. Just played the pokies for (hopefully) the last time ever.
I'm 30 and I've been playing the pokies for about 5 years. I've lost all my savings, have a huge credit card debt and owe friends and family even more.
Always the same game with the same bet amount.
When I get behind I just think one good spin will win it all back.
When I was running low on money I would think a good win will get me back on track
About a year and a half ago I started to get on top of it, I got a second job to help try to repay the money and without that financial stress things were going good. Then I got my girlfriend pregnant accidentally, and I love my son more than anything. But the stress of providing for a family on top of the debts has caused me to start gambling again.
Self exclusion won't work because I visit pubs and clubs from all over Sydney.

Does anyone have any tips on how to limit the amount of money you have available to gamble with? Mostly my gambling is very impulsive - I'll have an hour or two to spare and find a venue to play and I can lose hundreds of dollars in no time. Has anyone found a clever way of setting up bank accounts so you literally don't have access to the money you need to gamble? Or should I just leave the card in the drawer and carry a small amount of cash... Any ideas would be helpful thanks.
Gamble free since 22.01.18
Oregon
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Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Jeddie » Thu Nov 30, 2017 2:55 pm

Hey there Oregon, just want to let you know I have read your story. I will let others more qualified to answer you. You have done the first step to stopping so well done. Please watch the movie online called Ka Ching, the pokie nation. If you look on google or you tube you will see the full movie. Goes about 50 minutes. Read everything you can find about pokies and read other people’s very sad stories. You are not alone..

61 days GF
IN GAMBLING THE MANY MUST LOSE IN ORDER THAT THE FEW MAY WIN
George Bernard Shaw
Jeddie
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Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Mona58 » Thu Nov 30, 2017 6:37 pm

Hi Oregon

Put most of your money into paying the debts. Carry limited cash and leave cards home is all I can suggest re the money part. Limiting withdrawals to the bare minimum ... Learning to value money and not wanting to waste it gambling might help,

Learning to resist temptations and urges is just hard work Which gets easier over time but is something we have to work on all the time. Learning to deal with stresses of everyday life should not make us want to gamble as it only makes the stress worse.

Watch Ka!-Ching Pokie Nation (it's on ABC i view too) and you'll come to understand how addictive pokies are. They are more the cause of our stress. After a time being gamble free and with new knowledge you'll be able to cope with normal life stress better,

Mona in day 47 GF
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
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Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby DFP » Thu Nov 30, 2017 6:51 pm

Hi Oregon

I manage access to money by only carrying a small amount of cash, and having a credit card which has a 'no cash access' rule. You will not be able to get money out of ATM with that credit card. Most places accept tap and go for your expenses. If you need cash then you have a small amount.

Also works to share your plan with someone close so you feel accountable. They can keep your keycard and give you a small amount every now and again. Don't trust yourself with keycard.

Hope this helps

DFP
Always a 'work in progress'
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Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Jeddie » Thu Nov 30, 2017 7:05 pm

I agree with above. It takes a long time to trust yourself. I know that if I have just one shot I will go again and again. I’m very lucky (don’t like to use that word) I have no urges and seem able to carry money and keep money at home. I have told my partner that I am worried about my gambling and I have also told the whole story to my big brother and he is watching over me and we are having monthly financial meetings where he will look over my bank transactions. I asked him to do that, it is keeping me honest. I strongly advise you to tell as many people as you can that you know will support you. Keep talking on here to anyone who posts. It really helps to have someone in your corner


61 days GF
IN GAMBLING THE MANY MUST LOSE IN ORDER THAT THE FEW MAY WIN
George Bernard Shaw
Jeddie
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Posts: 254
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Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Oregon » Fri Dec 01, 2017 9:55 am

Thanks for the great advice. I have left my cards at home today and brought enough money for lunch only.
I'm on day 1! I guess yesterday counts as day 0 since my journey started after a morning trip to the "players lounge"

It's great to open up to people who don't judge. I have been keeping secrets and even those who know about my problems don't know the full extent. I know I have to open up to them too. Luckily I have very supportive friends and family.

This time quitting feels different - I didn't sleep at all last night, usually anxiety makes me exhausted until I collapse and sleep is my escape. But I was wide awake ready to confront and fight this problem!

Thanks again for the kind words and advice, I'll be sure to keep posting.
Gamble free since 22.01.18
Oregon
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Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2017 1:08 pm

Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Pikey94 » Fri Dec 01, 2017 10:22 am

If you can, try to go to a GA meeting. It will be nerve racking at first but you will feel relieved once you go in. And its great to talk to people who have the same problem as you. I've found it very helpful.
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Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Oregon » Fri Dec 01, 2017 11:11 am

Pikey94 wrote:If you can, try to go to a GA meeting. It will be nerve racking at first but you will feel relieved once you go in. And its great to talk to people who have the same problem as you. I've found it very helpful.


Thanks Pikey, I am definitely going to try anything and everything at least once.
Gamble free since 22.01.18
Oregon
Senior Member
 
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2017 1:08 pm

Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Jeddie » Fri Dec 01, 2017 4:17 pm

Lol, The Players Lounge, sounds a lovely place to go. No wonder we all like it 😀
IN GAMBLING THE MANY MUST LOSE IN ORDER THAT THE FEW MAY WIN
George Bernard Shaw
Jeddie
Senior Member
 
Posts: 254
Joined: Sun Oct 22, 2017 7:32 am

Re: My story - looking for advice

Postby Tja12345 » Fri Dec 01, 2017 4:59 pm

I'm wondering if Apple Pay would limit
Money..
It means I could buy things at shops but not withdraw.

I also find Internet banking and phone banking make it too easy to transfer money between accounts and withdraw money . I can transfer from my credit card to my debit account, go to the ATM, withdraw money and be back at the machine within 2 minutes.

Its made so easy for us...

I still have Internet and phone banking as I find it handy for other things, but if I need to cut it off, I will.
Tja12345
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