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6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby Charlotte (facilitator) » Thu Aug 24, 2017 5:39 pm

Amazing work Jinxywolf - the journey you have travelled is testimony not only to your motivation, commitment and determination, but also to the fact that we CAN change.

Huge congrats.

Charlotte :)
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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby JinxyWolf » Sat Sep 02, 2017 10:16 pm

Hey my Peeps,

Long time no hear. So how we all doin'? Still on the wagon I hope and if not, jump back on and just keep trying.

It's funny you know, even after nearly 7 months gamble free I still get nervous when I visit a venue. I was at my old haunt last night for a dinner and even though I had no intention of gambling and not even an urge to gamble I still found myself feeling nervous. I think it's just the fear rearing it's ugly head. The fear of falling back into old habits. So instead of giving into that fear like I would have in the past, I faced that fear head on, I acknowledge what I was feeling, told my Mum about it and wouldn't you know it I feel much more relaxed and the feeling has passed.

So here's to facing our Fears...and kickin' them in the butt.. :D :D :D :D

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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby pamela » Sun Sep 03, 2017 10:23 am

Well done Jinxywolf..you have come such a long way ..and it DOES feel good
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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby JinxyWolf » Tue Sep 05, 2017 11:23 pm

Hey Everyone.

Just spent $600 on new perscription glasses today (much needed). I found myself thinking, 6 months ago this would have been impossible, it would have put me in a tail spin. Running off to the pokies to try and win enough money to pay for them only to loose it all and feel like **** afterwards. Go crawling to mum to help me pay for them, trying to come up with an excuse as to why I didn't have the money. It's a great feeling to be able to pay bills and pay for essentials without the worry where I was gonna get the money.

This is just one of many examples of things that have changed in my life since giving up the pokies.

So stay strong everyone, and know that it is possible to kick this demon right where it hurts.

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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby pamela » Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:20 am

I understand how good you feel.it is liberating .well done
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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby David2 » Wed Sep 06, 2017 12:59 pm

You have a great attitude Jinxy.

I avoided a trigger 2 weekends ago. A big boxing fight was on and a friend asked if I wanted to go to a pub to watch it and I didn't go.

I know myself better than anyone and I'd rather have less of a social life then be a slave to the pokie machines. If I refuse to go to venues I can't gamble it's that simple. Maybe I should have more faith in myself but I don't need the temptation.

I hope we can still be telling each other that we are gambling free when 2017 comes to an end. Keep up the good work and inspiring people.
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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby JinxyWolf » Wed Sep 06, 2017 1:15 pm

Thanks Dave,

It is all about confidence, it's it. It took me about 3 months to regain confidence in my ability to manage my own finances. For 3 months I didn't have access to cash for fear of blowing it all on a binge, but with time my confidence grew to the stage where I felt I could handle it. However, by this stage, like you now, I was able to identify triggers in advance and plan. If I saw a trigger coming I would give up access to cash just to be safe.

Confidence comes with time, I still get nervous around venues, so I avoid them when possible. If I have to go to a venue, eg for dinner or work, I am honest with myself and say "Ok, I'm going to this venue, I'm a little anxious, but this feeling will pass, like all feelings, it will pass. I don't have to give into temptation, it will pass". Just be honest with what you are feeling, don't hide from it, and it will get easier.

You do what works, if you don't feel like you can visit a venue and not gamble, then don't go. One day you may be able to handle it, maybe not, time will tell. But I suggest if you have to go to a venue and you think the temptation may be too much, go with someone you trust, who knows about your problem, limit access to cash and just be honest with how you are feeling and know that those feelings, like urges, will pass.

Keep up the good work

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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby Jerry (facilitator) » Wed Sep 06, 2017 5:13 pm

Hi Dave,

Not going to the pub when you knew it was a temptation was great. It can be really hard to keep away from temptations.

I think that one thing that makes it easier is to find exciting alternatives to gambling.

You said that you didn't mind if your social life was less so you wouldn't gamble. That doesn't need to be the case. There are many ways to socialize that don't involve gambling.

Rather than just NOT socializing, maybe you could look towards finding some other ways to mingle with people.
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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby JinxyWolf » Thu Sep 07, 2017 6:02 pm

I just gotta get this off my chest,

Why is there so much conflict in this world? No matter where I go it's there. I get it at work, I get it at my golf club and now I'm seeing it here. Are we hard wired to conflict with others? is it just a matter of clashing personalities or is it more.
Take this place for example, we are all here for the same reason. To quit gambling. Searching for the support from others with that exact same goal. And yet there is conflict, I just don't get it. I know we all have our opinions and we have the right to express that opinion but what happens when that opinion just causes conflict and nothing else, should we still express that opinion or simply keep it to ourselves?

I used to love going to my Golf club, playing a round with the girls but sometimes I feel like I'm back in high school and we girls all know how that could be. It's like I'm 15 again and I'm surrounded by people who just want to complain about others and it's driving me crazy, to the point I don't really want to go back. But I do love my golf so for now I'll just put my blinders on and ignore it but it is getting harder and harder.

It is wearing me down, everywhere I look I see it and have to deal with it, and it just s*cks.

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Re: 6 Months of Freedom and Life is Good...

Postby Jerry (facilitator) » Fri Sep 08, 2017 3:22 pm

HI Jinxywolf,

People are complex and get passionate about things that concern them. This often lead to conflict.
Our brains are wired to pay attention to exciting conflict rather than relaxing peace.

(Arguing against negative people tends to get them all excited and riled up)

All you can do is try to be a force for good. Try to ignore the conflict and steer conversations towards the positive.

I for one have found you to be a very friendly and supportive influence here :)
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