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To The One's I Love

Discuss and ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!

Re: To The One's I Love

Postby Dave68 » Wed Sep 20, 2017 1:36 am

Great work, seven months is a fantastic effort and shows that you've been able to change so much in your life, compared to what things must have been like early in the new year. I've read your journey, and it must be doubly hard when you have a family too, my situation really only affected me as i've always been single. But what a change you've made, and the power of your mind and determination to make things better for your family is quite inspiring to read. Great stuff Lee!!
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby finally out » Sat Sep 23, 2017 1:22 am

Hey Lee,

I'm on Day two.

I just read the thread from the day your started it until now.

.Big congrats to you!!!

I just wanted to let you know when you are on DAY 2, like I am that its really good for me too read your story and the entire post. .Certainty gives me hope. Each page of the post i was waiting to see if you relapsed but you didn't. After reading the entire post I felt proud for you. i hope I can feel the same for me in 200 days. So Thanks :)
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby FamilyFirst » Sat Oct 28, 2017 11:19 pm

Hi Everyone,
Just dropping in to say hello.
I've been 251 days gamble free now, a touch over 8 months.
For those who don't know my story my problems were with landbased pokies and Keno mainly as well as BlackJack at the casino.
When I quit gambling I also stopped playing all online (free) games, I used to play slots, bj and poker on various sites.
I began to play these games again about a month ago and I was quite shocked to see that aristocrat has two sites that I know of that offer the same games that are in venues!!! It's great for me as I get all the thrills I used to get, but for people who have never had gambling problems and are naive enough these type of apps are going to ruin many lives down the track :(

Anyway I hope that everyone out there can realise that it's quite easy to quit once you've made the decision to, Limit your access to cash and credit, just take it one day at a time and when you get those gambling thoughts just try to remember of all the heartache and stress our problem gambling puts us though, try to think of the worst gambling related moments. Most importantly I think we need to accept what's done is done, move on and rebuild our lives.
Take care all,
Cheers Lee,
251 Days GF
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby Dave68 » Sun Oct 29, 2017 12:48 am

G'day FamilyFirst...Well done on over 8 months GF, and it's almost like that you have kind of found what i call the nicotine patch of a recovering gambler, the free apps that do have the same games, yet are free and for me are a great outlet...and reminder, of my gambling past.

The realism of them is what sort of gets me, but in saying that, the realism replicates almost exactly the feeling playing the moneyed machines. Even tonight, playing the luck lantern game, i went from about 5 million, to about 35 million....and then replicating how my pokie play would go, betting 100,000 tokens a spin, i lost the lot!

Not a sausage left, and i could feel in my brain how my quasi anxiety of 'gota get that feature', i'll stop at 15 mill, 10 mill...but still i played it, down to the inexorable end. And even a feeling of annoyance at losing all of those free tokens. But not to worry, as you get extra tokens every 15 minutes, and you just build up again.

I really wonder if these games existed at the same time as the real ones, would i have ever played the real ones at all? For over 15 years i was in the thrall of the machines, in venues and even the online ones, and just lost money hand over fist. Never massive amounts, maximum usually several hundred, but over that time i racked up over 70K of debts. In my case now, it's 42 months gamble free, and i have no desire at all to go into a venue to play any of these games, i just play on my smartphone. I don't even get tempted to 'buy' the tokens that they do encourage you to do, i can honestly say i have totally removed the aspect of money with playing these games.

As you said FF, i wonder if playing these first may encourage people to play the real McCoys in venues, or will they just be the taste of excitement that they offer? I am rather amazed at how real the experience is for me, the thrill of getting features, the anxiety of watching the balance reduce, and the reality of the fact that i most often lose all my tokens, which tells me exactly what would happen if i played the real ones anyway. For a single bloke like me who enjoys solitude when not working, they are a bit of a godsend.

I probably started playing them several months after stopping, probably late 2014 with the Heart of Vegas on my desktop, and in the last few months the Cashman casino on my phone. I do reckon that if anyone is really finding urges to play the real ones , and wants to perhaps try something to assuage those pangs, these might be worth a try. They have many of the current games, and for me they replicate the whole experience, including the frustration of losing to an astounding degree. Even for me, the feeling that i am sure many gamblers have felt....that kind of rush coming from knowledge that you have to be somewhere, be it work, getting home, or even getting to bed, but you're kind of still wanting to play the app. I can't explain it but i just marvel at how effectively for me they have substituted playing for money, with just playing for the game. If anything it's almost the 2010's version for me of the old NIntendo game boy!!

But as with you FF, the gambling free period is now having positive outcomes. My tax debt is all but paid, my housing loan is refinanced, and i can now finally take steps to getting my girlfriend from overseas here..something that my gambling for many years had just about completely sabotaged. I can buy groceries, repair the car, pay the bills....and i don't even tend to carry cash at all now. It took a hell of a long time, but the Titanic has finally stopped taking on water and i'm bailing it out. Will take a lot more time in the future, but i can honestly say the improvements in my life are now tangible and actual.
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby Mona58 » Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:23 am

Thank you Lee for sharing your story and journey!

Mona in day 15!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby JinxyWolf » Sun Nov 19, 2017 7:01 pm

Hey Lee,

Just saw you congrat post on my thread so thought I'd pop in and return the sentiment.

Big Congrats on your 9 Month of freedom and here is to many many many more :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool:

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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby FamilyFirst » Tue Dec 05, 2017 10:34 pm

Hello Everyone,
It's been a while so I thought I'd better pop in and say that I'm still Gamble Free!
Over 9 months now, and the longest time spent GF in my life!
Thanks for the ongoing support guys, it means a lot to me :o
I barely think about gambling on the pokies anymore and when I do it just seems such a stupid and dumb idea. I still have very limited access to my own hard earned money and I keep all receipts for my partner to see if she wants to. Most of the time I use a MasterCard with a no withdrawal option and it's normally paywave anyway.
I got paid a cash bonus for a job the other week. I planned straight away to get a carton of Scotch for $90 leaving $10 change. It was a half hour from the job to the hotel near home and by the time I pulled up It was set in my mind I was going to put the $10 in the pokies after i purchased the carton.
By the time I was walking the slab of Johnnie back to my car, the whole $10 in the pokies idea seemed totally wrong and I actually felt sick and deflated like I'd just had a bad loss like the 'old days'!!!
As I cracked open a coldie later on though I breathed a sigh of relief and smiled :)

For those doing it tough right now, this illness CAN be beaten so long as we make an effort to beat it. Limit access to funds, get a councillor, go to GA meetings, start new or old hobbies, talk to friends and family and let them know of your problems and your commitment to stop gambling. Start repaying loans, cards and other debt and rebuild your life one day at a time. Those with families me included probably owe it to them to spend more time with one another to make up for all the times we missed them, for we were trying just one last $50 to get the feature...
Anyway take care all, you can do this.
Cheers, Lee

P.S cheers Jinxy, love your work!! Hope your enjoying the new clubs. I can't even justify buying myself a carton of beer lately, when I'd blow $800 in an hour or two gambling.... :confused:
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby DFP » Tue Dec 05, 2017 11:37 pm

Family first - congratulations on 9 months. Thank you for the post above - it includes the most complete but concise overview of 'best advice' I've seen. Very useful. Very inspiring. (Copied below):


For those doing it tough right now, this illness CAN be beaten so long as we make an effort to beat it. Limit access to funds, get a councillor, go to GA meetings, start new or old hobbies, talk to friends and family and let them know of your problems and your commitment to stop gambling. Start repaying loans, cards and other debt and rebuild your life one day at a time. Those with families me included probably owe it to them to spend more time with one another to make up for all the times we missed them, for we were trying just one last $50 to get the feature...
Anyway take care all, you can do this.
Cheers, Lee
Always a 'work in progress'
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby FamilyFirst » Sun Dec 24, 2017 10:54 pm

Merry Christmas All,

Hope you all have a safe and happy festive season :cool:

All is good and well with me and I reached 10 months GF last week!!
I rarely think about gambling anymore, well that's not true, I think about gambling but the urge to act on the impulse has virtually gone from my life.

Life has indeed taken over :)

I'm keeping myself busy with work, gardening, playing with the kids and still reading heaps of books as well as hanging out with my partner and kids doing the things that normal families do..

Hang in there everyone, every day spent gamble free is a win.
Cheers, Lee
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Re: To The One's I Love

Postby JinxyWolf » Mon Dec 25, 2017 3:55 pm

Hi Lee,

Merry Christmas. Great to hear you hit your 10 month anniversary Congrats. :cool: :cool:

I just know that the a couple of months we will be celebrating our 1 year anniversary of being gamble free together.

I too would like to thank you for your support during this journey, you and others like you on this forum have made all the difference to me in my journey to becoming gamble free.

Have a great Christmas and a Safe and Gamble free New Year.

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