" "

Tired and fed up

Discuss and ask questions, offer advice, and share your story in here. If you are new to the site drop in and say hello!

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Oregon » Thu Mar 22, 2018 5:10 am

Hi GiveUpForGood

Congratulations on slowly gaining back control of your addiction. Please keep logging in and sharing your story

Stay Strong
Oregon
Gamble free since 22.01.18
Oregon
Senior Member
 
Posts: 115
Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2017 1:08 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby User 586eee5282d07 » Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:34 am

Welcome back, this addiction so easily lures us back into its clutches...just take it a day at a time and let us know how you,re going.

Sandra
User 586eee5282d07
Senior Member
 
Posts: 318
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2017 3:37 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Giveupforgood » Tue Apr 17, 2018 11:15 pm

Didnt last long at all last time around. And here i am back again.....trying again. I really wanna make it to 100 days! Ive just finished reading a finance book which has given me a new perspective on money and outlook on things like retirement and where i should be putting my money ect. Im currently 3 days down gamble free. Only 3 days and such a great feeling. 3 days and full of confidence......3 days and i think ive got this.....but sadly 3 days and in the back of my mind im thinking when will i give in not if. Anyway i will see where it takes me this time. I have my counter going again and i will try and keep posting updates this time. Fingers crossed.
Giveupforgood
Member
 
Posts: 82
Joined: Thu Mar 09, 2017 10:43 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby SickOfThePunt » Tue Apr 17, 2018 11:32 pm

Hi! Gee wiz your story I could’ve written myself,
I too am a sucker for Horseracing (throw The Dogs and Harness in too 🙄) and its a recipe for disaster.
It’s so easy for me to fall back in the trap (day 3 tomorrow) , with easy access to punting through apps on my phone, if only it was hard like actually entering a TAB venue in the old days.
I have been gambling for almost 20 years and it makes me sick to my stomach to even admit that!
Not a lot of people know my secret , I keep it well hidden and to look at me you’d never know. But look at my bank statements and there’s a whole other story 🙄

I got paid today. I paid my bills and not a cent on the punt. I feel good and made sure I occupied myself until the races were over tonight.

I really hope I can do this, I’ve been wanting to get out for so long, just trying to stay positive because I feel like I loved it so much. Now I see that I loved the adrenaline, I hated the sleepless nights that followed, the phone calls from creditors because I couldn’t pay my bills, I hope these disappear.
Good luck on your journey, know that you are not alone.
SickOfThePunt
Junior Member
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Sun Apr 15, 2018 11:02 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Giveupforgood » Thu Apr 19, 2018 7:20 pm

Great to hear from a fellow racing punter! Stuck with me bud we will try and knock down some days together. I cant make any promises but ill be here trying with ya! Im so glad the autumn carnival is over and i can try and lose a bit of interest again! Im day 5 now and going well. Getting through this saturday punt free is my mission at the moment!
Giveupforgood
Member
 
Posts: 82
Joined: Thu Mar 09, 2017 10:43 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Mona58 » Thu Apr 19, 2018 7:24 pm

I'm in your corner. -. Sick of the Punt and Give up for Good! You can do it!

and welcome back johnno!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.~Confucius
Mona58
Senior Member
 
Posts: 805
Joined: Sun Oct 15, 2017 11:44 am

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Giveupforgood » Sun Jun 10, 2018 7:18 pm

I just cant seem to do this. Something always comes up where i end up having a bet. I am scared of not ever having a bet again. Its just crap. Ive formed relationships with people who like to bet and i dont know how to hang out with them and not have a bet. Theres so many different aspects to it all. Im losing so much money but just cant pull my head out of the sand for long enough to realise what this is doing for me. The last few months i have become quite depressed at times.....i feel im slipping further down a path i dont want to go down but i just cant give away punting on horses. I have my back against the wall financially and lost 3k this week alone whi h i cant afford. I wouldve lost 10k in the last month which would solve 99% of my problems if i still had it but ive thrown it all away. Today i want to guve it away but i know tomorrow or sometime soon ill be back for one more. It is ruining me
Giveupforgood
Member
 
Posts: 82
Joined: Thu Mar 09, 2017 10:43 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby JinxyWolf » Sun Jun 10, 2018 10:31 pm

Hi GivingupforGood,

I understand the fear. Thinking about never having a bet again can be overwhelming, so I found it helps to put in smaller steps. Think about saying "I will not have a bet in the next 10 minutes, then when that time is up, add another 10 minutes and another and so on". Once you are comfortable with that, move the time out further like, I won't have a bet in the next half hour or the next hour. Then before you know it you'll be up to a day, a week then a month. It's hard I know, when we decide to kick this habit it can be like saying goodbye to an old friend, as crazy as that sounds, but it's just like that, we spend so much of our time with this "Friend" through our ups and downs, we turn to our "friend" for comfort, so it is hard to say goodbye. To think we won't see this friend again can be scary but say goodbye we must. So say goodbye to this "friend" no good can come from this relationship, only pain and misery.

It's hard when the people you socialize with also gamble. I wish I had some advise for you but all I can suggest is that maybe it would be worth explaining your situation and finding other things to do with them besides betting. If you can't control your spending around them maybe you need to take a break until you get some gamble free days under your belt and strengthen your resolve. You need to look after yourself.

I wish you the best.

JinxyWolf
User avatar
JinxyWolf
Senior Member
 
Posts: 285
Joined: Wed Feb 15, 2017 7:51 pm

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Cazza » Sun Jun 10, 2018 11:13 pm

Holy cow j i have just read through your whole journey, and love that you continue to post.

To be honest and forgive me if i am wrong but you sound like you have just hit "your " rock bottom. It's exhausting when we mentally fight our addiction over and over again.
When we vow that we are cutting down or cutting back and then we can't or in reality we really don't want to.
I got to the point of being so tired of the lying about money, time lost or even where i actually was. Tired of being in a bad mood from a loss and even a win because I had to come home and not keep going. Then finally i got tired of just being bloody tired all of the time.
I came home one night and just told my husband everything and then gave up all money control to him. I know for me personally this was going to be the only way for me to stop.

We gamblers need to have as many blocks in place as available but it's our mental strength that keeps us toeing the line.
Wishing you much strength on your 100 days journey 😊
Cazza
Senior Member
 
Posts: 164
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2018 7:23 am

Re: Tired and fed up

Postby Jc » Mon Jun 11, 2018 1:05 am

I just read your entire thread. I see youre in a lot of pain. I felt the pain for you. I have a


There are two common triggers for EVERY one of your relapses:

Being under the illusion that you can somehow ‘control’ your bets
The thing Ive found in my struggles to quit over the years, was that after a few weeks of abstaining, I always thought I was HEALED. I always got a bit cocky after a few weeks. Like yeah, Ive done my 3 weeks, one bet won’t hurt right? And then I found myself spiraling out of control. Just remember the words from gamblers anonymous ‘one bet is too much and a thousand bets is never enough’. The only way to fully heal and beat your addiction is 100% abstinance. People have been supporting you here for some time, and many repeated and repeated and repeated that you must quit altogether, not try and control it. Once youve become an addict, thats it. But Ive read all your posts and you just seemed to either ignore or not register everyones support on the abstinence. I know its hard, we’ve all been down that road, but I REALLY hope you can abstain from betting completely. Youve tried, just like myself to be a controlled gambler, and it didnt work. PLEASE abstain. When you quit something you love, something thats been a part of you for years, it leaves a gaping hole in your life. You need to fill it with something else.

I’m only on day 43 so Im just a novice, but I get these urges to have one little bet on the sports. One bet wont hurt right? Instead of thinking about the bet, think about if you win. Will you be happy if you win? What will you do with the winnings? Will you bet again if you win?

I would get paid, and then I’d allocate a certain amount to gambling. Id promise myself that will be it. And yet I’d still break my own pledge and end up dumping a weeks worth of wage into sportsbet. I was delusional. And it took me about a year to figure out this (i didnt know this forum existed).p

your gambling buddies
EVERYTIME you were progressing well, youd post here and say, ‘bad news, I was with my friends and...’ (not verbatim).

You either confess to your friends about your addiction and tell them to tone it down or try ither activities, or you drop them completely. It sounds harsh, but those people youre referring to are called ‘enablers’. Its pretty common amongst addicts of all types. These people will enable/entice you to bet no matter how hard youre trying to stay away. If the only thing you have in common is gambling, then think about the entire friendships and see if its worth keeping. At the end of the day, you need to think of yourself and not pleasing others. I told my friends who I gambled with that I’m quitting and theyve respected my wishes. The few that didnt Ive dropped them as friends. Its hard you know, but Id rather be alone and healed then be friends with people who enable my addictions (mind you they probably arent addicted - mine werent). Try doinf things alone, go to the movies alone, go fishing alone, go on a night out alone.


I really hope you or anyone else get angry or upset with my post. We all need to be honest with ourselves. Relapses are part of recovery. The road isnt a straight path, it has many twists and turns. But you have to learn from your relapses. I feel your pain man. Its a lonely, broken life.
Last edited by Jc on Mon Jun 11, 2018 2:01 am, edited 3 times in total.
Jc
Member
 
Posts: 70
Joined: Mon Sep 07, 2015 5:13 am

PreviousNext

Return to The Courtyard

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest
cron