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Ending the cycle for good

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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby Pea pod » Mon Jul 17, 2017 9:29 am

Popeye sorry to hear about your relapse. Yes I know that feeling. With me the physical and emotional pain of the gamberling hangover had taken its toll and it's frightening. The heavy heart and sleeplessness it seems to get worst each relapse for me. I have been out of money since my binge on the pokies last week. I get paid this week and yes I am making plans for the cash. I am promising myself I will not gamble that pay away. I had a bank statement in the mail come and I began to add up all the atm withdrawals but began to feel sick so I had to stop. I have lost so much money it's to hard to fathom. I can't face it but I know over a decade and more I have lost a lot. I wish this wasn't my story but is. I want to be different I want to end the cycle for good. It is the hardest thing i have ever endured. Today is 6 of not gamberling. Such a little number but I hope it ends in a 0 to be 60 days again.
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby jimi68 » Mon Jul 17, 2017 9:53 am

yeah...
Sometimes I would go shopping with plenty of money
I would get urge and go and play first in the venue.
I remmenber looking down at my wallet when only $50 left for my food for that day.
my need to keep gambling so stong I would end up saying
PUT IT IN ...play down to 40 bucks and collect, I can still eat well..
then play down to 30...
then play down to 20...
and so on
with $50 I could buy bottle of whisky and a big yummy fast food!
but I end up with $6 left from $200
a five dollar special of wine and those yuk no name brand instant noodles. :mad:

54 days from now youl be smiling again :)
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby POPEYE » Tue Jul 18, 2017 9:08 am

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Last edited by POPEYE on Fri Sep 08, 2017 8:15 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby jimi68 » Tue Jul 18, 2017 10:46 am

popeye
it is day 2 for you.
YOUR NOT GAMBLING
If you really wanted too, you could go to a venue look for a dollar on the floor and play 100x 1 cent.
I did that once.
BUT YOUR NOT DOING THAT.
YOUR NOT GAMBLING. that's the main thing.
You remind me of myself waiting for the payday reward.
Whatever you do as soon as you get your money first BUY THAT ROAST and go home.
Don't let the devious gambling voice that comes when we have money get you into the pokies first
or you could end up with no roast.
You deserve That reward because of the crap your going through this week.
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby Pea pod » Tue Jul 18, 2017 3:26 pm

The urge the urge the urge. It came and it went. I talked to it and I tamed it. My goodness they are strong and unpredictable. My addiction wanted to be fed today and I had the $$ to feed it but I won because I told it I would not give in to it. I
Told my urge to leave me alone and eventually it did. I won today. Day 7.
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby POPEYE » Tue Jul 18, 2017 4:30 pm

.
Last edited by POPEYE on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby Shirley (facilitator) » Tue Jul 18, 2017 4:50 pm

Hi Popeye,

Rarely do we master a new skill overnight and there will often be slip-ups along the way. That being said, what happens now will determine whether this remains as a slip up OR whether it becomes a full blown relapse. It might feel normal to give yourself a hard time and hook into thoughts about guilt, shame and remorse but giving yourself a hard time isn't helpful. In fact , guilt and shame about gambling can lead to more urges to gamble.... Instead, try to think instead about what you can learn from the slip up. What would have been helpful to you and what can you do differently when you experience the urge in future? Think about things like what you were thinking and feeling when you lapsed and what led to the slip up? Think about protecting your money and whether limited access using a notice saver account would have made a difference (RABO DIRECT - an online bank offer 30 day, 60 day and 90 day notice saver accounts to curb impulsive spending). What else would have been helpful? Think about strategies to manage urges such as taking deep breaths, going for a walk, reminding yourself urges are time limited, or calling gamblers helpline. Or perhaps having a set goal like the 100 day challenge, or having some other plans in place on payday. Looking at things from this constructive viewpoint rather than from a critical POV can make a big difference toward you reaching your new goal.

Anyway Popeye, onward and upwards.

Regards,
Shirley
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby jimi68 » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:35 pm

well done peapod !!!
This is you WIN...
not the pokies..
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby POPEYE » Tue Jul 18, 2017 10:28 pm

.
Last edited by POPEYE on Wed Sep 06, 2017 9:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Ending the cycle for good

Postby Pea pod » Wed Jul 19, 2017 8:16 am

Popeye I can relate to a lot of your feelings. I think I have a very low self esteem and this comes from since I was a kid. I get bored easily and the danger and thrill of gambling is a perfect medicine for my symptoms. Sitting alone, thrill of the chase, feeling reckless, feeling important, people looking at my machine when it wins and sings. All these things made it appealing but inside really I was screaming. As my atm withdrawals creep up I find myself highly stressed and upset. You can't win on the pokies nor will they solve problems they only make them worst.
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