" "

This time it feels like I really can do this

The 100 Day Challenge is a program where you set your goals - reduce your gambling or stop gambling altogether, it's up to you. Log onto the 100 Day Challenge website to follow the real stories of four Australians trying to give up gambling for inspiration and get the tools and support you need to find the real you. Click here to sign up, and post about your own challenge here on the Gambling Help Online Community Forum!


This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Kim » Mon Apr 03, 2017 10:43 pm

Hi all. Been on and off this forum for some years now. Sometimes I contribute then I fail myself and go back to the pokies and stop even reading here because I just go back to the pokies again. Feel like this time is different. The posts and community here just gets better and better each time I come back. So supportive and for once I feel like I'm really taking in and more importantly believing what so many of you that are succeeding are saying about pokies and your advice. Before I think I was just halfor hearted about my efforts and kept thinking oh I can just dabble. Nope I can't!! I just wanted to believe I could because I wanted to keep playing. I finally see and admit it for what it really is. Anyway I'm 10 days pokie free tomorrow and feeling more positive about giving up for good than I have in many many years of trying lots of different things. Face to face counselling for 18 months and that ended about 18 months ago now. Phone counselling for 8 weeks. Trying 100 day challenge about 10 times and never made it past 45 days. Reading material online. I think it just takes time for reality to really sink in for some of us on this journey and I feel this time it has sunk in for me. Just can't take this Rollercoaster and the financial stress from years of pokie damage anymore. I deserve better!!! Thanks for reading if you have.
Kim
Member
 
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:43 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby pamela » Tue Apr 04, 2017 8:43 am

Hi Kim..I believe the key to stop playing is really WANTING to.For most of us its all or nothing but if you want it bad enough you will achieve it..like anything in life.I wish you well and hope you can stop this time so you can start to enjoy life.
pamela
Senior Member
 
Posts: 1371
Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Catherine1 » Tue Apr 04, 2017 8:50 am

Yes Kim I agree with you. I have been much the same. Giving up for periods of time and then thinking I can have a little dabble without too much damage, but then the machines suck you in again and you are back where you started. Wasting time and money in those machines.

I am at week 7 plus 3 days, and I feel it is different for me this time too. I have had enough of wasting money. I also know now that I can't just put $20 in and walk away. I have to stay away full stop.

All the best with your challenge. We can do this together.
Catherine1
Member
 
Posts: 91
Joined: Sat Aug 16, 2014 9:19 am

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Kim » Tue Apr 04, 2017 9:49 pm

Pamela it's so true what you said. It's like I finally have had that really become true for me in that I know I really want to give them up and can finally see clearly. The past 15 years have been like a fog. It's bizarre when you realise how much of your life has been consumed by gambling. It's sort of shocking and especially because I've done it all by myself and I can't reverse it. Can only look forward. I think it's going to be a few hard weeks in terms of emotional stuff coming up over the damage and realisation of how much time I wasted and the financial damage. Probably need to ring the helpline. I feel very strong with my willpower it's more knowing that we keep playing pokies to escape reality so obviously some stuff is going to come up over the whole situation. Funny thing is I feel incredibly liberated at the same time. Before when I would say yep I'm going to stop I would still allow myself to have images of pokie play in my mind and scenarios of walking in to play and the whole mindset..no wonder i would just go back again even though i was saying out loud oh ill give up i was so going back!! It was just words i didnt mean to follow through on..I can see that now..the difference now is that I just feel completely repulsed by any pokie thoughts and just push it away whereas before I would let the possibility of gambling sneak in. I'm feeling good that my mindset is so different to what it's ever been. I know what you mean Catherine just cannot put even a dollar in..although it was always just one $50.. can't do it and life will be so much better. I love the posts where I can see the change from the person posting on day one to the posts weeks or month later and they still haven't gambled..it's like a different person writing. It's really inspiring. That's what I'm working towards too..I want to be the inspirational person that has days then weeks then months then years under their belt too 😊😊
Kim
Member
 
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:43 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby pamela » Wed Apr 05, 2017 1:14 am

Kym everything is achievable and stopping this habit certainly is.you can retrain your brain and your way of thinking to live a better life free from the shackles of gambling.Be determined and remember we dont play the pokies..they play us
pamela
Senior Member
 
Posts: 1371
Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:38 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby blastoise (facilitator) » Wed Apr 05, 2017 3:39 pm

Hi Kim and Catherine,

You both raise some really good points. Do you think that each time you have reduced/stopped, it has been easier each time? What has helped? What didnt?

If the 100 day challenge isnt helpful, do some more counselling! I always say you can never get enough, talking it out with someone is so much better. Speaking from experience, I'd talk about the problem, then often ramble about something else, but always leave feeling a little less burdened.

There is a phone counselling program for NSW, and SA residents through Gamblers Help called Ready 2 Change which has been really helpful for some people, so if you live in those states, maybe something to consider.

Blastoise
blastoise (facilitator)
Senior Member
 
Posts: 222
Joined: Thu Nov 26, 2015 3:49 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Kim » Thu Apr 06, 2017 8:03 am

Hi Pamela thanks I forgot - yes the pokies do play us indeed. I have seen some threads where the word play in regard to pokies had been dissected. The word play indicates a happy carefree mood to me and it's anything but that on those machines. Blastoise I think what had made me arrive at my latest determination to finally give up gambling is an absorption over several years of things such as counseling, I did do the ready to change programme last year thank you..still have the booklets so I'll dig those out again as at the time when I look back I wasn't ready to change BUT I still think it was worthwhile because it's as though the things I have done the past few years such as counselling reading materials..reading this forum were being absorbed very very slowly unfortunately..I wish it had taken faster but I feel like I've arrived finally. I have an arsenal of work I have done trying to give up these past few years! In my calendar on my phone every time I tried the 100 day challenge I kept a record. I.e. day one 100 day challenge and so on..it's really interesting to look at how I did each time! This is a diary over a few years mind you. So to see all thise entries dotted throughout and sometime going to 9 days ir so..sometimes one.. them when i broke i would jot down a note in my phone calendar instead like "spent 1000 at blah blah rsl horrible blowout". Very sobering to look back at and im so glad i kept these records because it reminded me how many tomes itried..how many times I had a terrible loss and it brought back the awful memory walking out then driving home often sobbing my eyes out while driving ugh..so it's good to remember but also a motivator to think come on Kim get real!! This forum is incredible too so I have been here a lot over the years..it's one of the biggest drivers for me and so many others on this journey..thank you thank you..so much brilliant advice.
Kim
Member
 
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:43 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Jo-Anne » Thu Apr 06, 2017 1:11 pm

Hi Kim.....I haven't been on here for a while as I slipped up last year and thought I was spending too much time focused on gambling and needed to step away for a while.

Also I tried to change my e-mail address here and it mucked up my account so I couldn't get back in to retrieve any of my messages (sorry Pamela!), so just gave up on it. Little did I know re-registering would reset it all....😊😊

I am proud to say that I have not gambled for six months and going strong. I have been coming back on the forum for a month or so now and felt I would like to take an active part again.

When I saw your post Kim, I felt moved to actually post and offer you my support. We have supported each other before very well. You are a very smart lady, you know the pitfalls. You will feel so much better staying away from the pokies......life gives us so many challenges as it is, and we all know about the added stress of wasting money gambling.

So I am challenging myself to aspire to a year gambling free, and I would love you to join me with your own challenge Kim!!

Talk soon!!
Last edited by Jo-Anne on Thu Apr 06, 2017 7:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Jo-Anne
Senior Member
 
Posts: 354
Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2016 10:40 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Kim » Thu Apr 06, 2017 5:15 pm

Joanne - hello again!! I saw your name on another post when I had a look this afternoon and said to myself yes Jo is back 😁 I remember we gave each other a lot of support last year. You were a huge support to me. Then we both disappeared for a while there. I am so glad to be able to congratulate you on 6 month!!.that is just fantastic. Thank you Jo for posting on this thread that i began. I must say it is great to be back and with old and new friends. This is a wonderful community isnt it. Ok I take you up on the challenge and I will set myself three months to begin with. I never made it past 45 days in the past 5 years.had lots of mini challenges such as 5 to 14 days but never any proper abstinence...so three months is doable and yet a challenge still. Can't wait to get there!! I'm glad that you have stayed away from gambling jo..it's very inspiring 😁 12 days today for me and feeling good and strong.
Kim
Member
 
Posts: 58
Joined: Sun Apr 07, 2013 12:43 pm

Re: This time it feels like I really can do this

Postby Jo-Anne » Thu Apr 06, 2017 7:37 pm

Three months would be awesone Kim.........as with you I am setting my challenge very high. The most I have been gamble free in the past 20 years was about 2 & 1/2 years......but it has been mostly six months to a year between relapses. At the moment I am feeling very strong and think a year is achievable! Let's go for it Kim....... ;) ;) ;) ;) One day at a time........then one day more!!
Jo-Anne
Senior Member
 
Posts: 354
Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2016 10:40 pm

Next

Return to Take the 100 Day Challenge

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests